ALLIGATOR NUTS, Florida – (Satire News) – Well ladies and gentleman, it has rolled in once again, and the scramble will soon begin. Those two dreaded words – Hurricane Season, are now upon us, like Philadelphia Cream Cheese on a bagel.
Weathermen and weatherwomen and meteorologists are already brushing up on their hurricane cliché phrases such as storm surge, the eye of the storm, and the one no one wants to hear, it’s too damn late now, we told y’all to evacuate six hours ago!
The first hurricane of the season, named "AAA," is already churning down south of Brazil, at 113 mph, and it’s setting its sights for Key West, Florida.
The brave hurricane hunters are already up in the air in their Cessna's, Piper Cubs, and one rich HH’er from Beverly Hills in his Lear Jet.
Meanwhile Lowes and Home Depot have increased their plywood orders by as much as 625%.
Lowes has put a call into a company in Osaka, Japan that makes flashlights, and they’ve ordered 2 million.
And the biggest tequila importer in the nation, Tequila Mucho, Inc. with its home office in Corn Shuck, Iowa, will soon be receiving 200, 18-wheeler trucks loaded with El Matador Tequila, La Muchacha Bonita Tequila, Tequila Mockingbird, and Stimulus Tequila, which will be heading over to Florida.
And in An Unrelated Story. Former heavyweight champ, Mike Tyson, says that the rumors that he will be fighting 3 Australian adult kangaroos on Pay Per View are totally false.