BATON ROUGE – (Satire News) – After hearing complaint after complaint about the mosquito problem, the Louisiana State Senate has promised the citizens of their state that they will completely eradicate every mosquito in the state by September of 2023.
Reports have surfaced that the “Skeeter” problem is so bad in some of the marshes, swamps, and bayous, that alligators and crocodiles are starting to leave the state and relocate to Mississippi, Alabama, and Florida.
State Senator Claudell “Etoufee” DuMacaroon of Pelican Balls, Louisiana, told members of the news media that he has heard from some of the backwoods Cajuns that crayfish hunters have reported seeing male mosquitoes trying to mate with storks.
One hard-core hunter said that it was not a pretty picture. He said that he ended up having to shoot the mosquito with his Glock-9 handgun, so that it would turn the stork lose.
In Weather News. Hurricane season is right around the corner so people can expect the price of plywood to go up by 300%.