MANHATTAN – (Satire News) – Ivanka Trump says that she is pissed off at the fact that because so many Americans hate her racist, predatorial father so much, they are taking it out on her.
The long-legged giraffe, as comedian Zydeco Dupree calls her, said that the spacey blonde with black roots (hair not race) needs to distance herself from her father, geographically as well as physically.
Dupree noted that the orange Trumptard touches Ivanka’s ass, probably more than her own wimpy husband, Jared Kushner does.
Ivanka does want the American people, Republicans, Democrats, Independents, and atheists, to know that she has never had, nor does she now have any STD’s; including the Bulgarian Butt Invader; which this writer has never, ever heard of.
[EDITOR’S NOTE: I Googled it, and like Abel, I did not find it anywhere either.]
