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Funny satire stories about STDs

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Funny story: Kimberly Guilfoyle Denies The Rumor That She Has Cellulite On Her Ovaries

Kimberly Guilfoyle Denies The Rumor That She Has Cellulite On Her Ovaries

PORT-au-PRINCE, Haiti – (Satire News) – Kimmy Guilfoyle and her Trump boyfriend, Donnie Jr., were vacationing down on Port-au-Prince's' La Isla De Las Papayas Beach, when she was asked by a reporter with Hollywood Innuendo about her ovaries issue.

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Funny story: Man With Herpes On His Top Lip Told His Wife "It's Nowt"

Man With Herpes On His Top Lip Told His Wife "It's Nowt"

A man who had a rather unsightly mark on his top lip, which eventually turned out to be a nasty case of Herpes Simplex* was forced to tell a blatant lie to his wife when she asked him what it was. Moys Kenwood, 57, noticed the pronounced red blemi…

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Funny story: Ivanka Trump and Her Scary STD Scare

Ivanka Trump and Her Scary STD Scare

MAR-A-LAGO, Florida – (Satire News) – Followers of the ex-first daughter Ivanka Trump, say that the 6-foot-2-inch human giraffe has been trying to keep a low profile since her daddy got his ass kicked by President Joe Biden. The fake blonde has ev…

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Funny story: Latest from the CDC: COVID-19 is an STD

Latest from the CDC: COVID-19 is an STD

As mentioned in my last post, the Coronavirus Detectives Club (CDC) is now telling us that COVID-19 is an STD. Spokesperson David Shlong explained that an STD is any disease that can be contracted during sex, and STD's can basically be b...

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Funny story: Britain celebrates anniversary of VD day

Britain celebrates anniversary of VD day

It is 75 years to the day when war-weary Brits celebrated the defeat of the Hun by getting shit-faced drunk in a wild orgy of sex and alcohol. In 1945, the streets of London, Manchester and even Hull were piled-high with the hungover and the shagged-...

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Funny story: STD Numbers Drop For The First Time in 17 Years

STD Numbers Drop For The First Time in 17 Years

CHICAGO – Recent polls report that STD numbers are at the lowest level that they have been since March of 2003. The figures clearly show that, since so many individuals are now sheltering-in-place, the incidences of vodie oh doeing have just about...

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Funny story: Since C-19, Phone Sexting Has Increased by 875 Percent

Since C-19, Phone Sexting Has Increased by 875 Percent

CHICAGO – One of the Windy City’s leading psychologists says that she has noticed a big increase in the amount of phone sexting that is now taking place. Dr. Wanda Leigh Zabinowitz, who has thousands of clients, says that a big majority of her cli...

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Funny story: Dr. Quigley: The Editor Apologises

Dr. Quigley: The Editor Apologises

It is not often that we at The Spoof are victims of hoaxes, fraudulent behaviour or what the great unwashed call "scams", but in the case of so-called Dr. Quigley I feel it is behoven upon me to apologise for his sexually obsessed articles and gratuitous behaviour. The Spoof is a reputable news organ and we thoroughly research the material which we produce, and we vet our employees and their qu...

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Funny story: Dr. Quigley Writes: Sexually Transmitted Infections - Where's the Shame in Them?

Dr. Quigley Writes: Sexually Transmitted Infections - Where's the Shame in Them?

Let's face it, you can catch a cold or flu from a stranger's sneeze on a bus and you can get food poisoning in a dodgy restaurant. You can't catch them from a toilet seat, but there's real pleasure involved in catching STIs. Admit it. Ladies, you love your pork sausage and gentlemen, you love to wield that sausage. Sometimes you can both get so carried away that you just have to do it regardles...

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Funny story: 'Fellatio Cafe' is slated to open in Switzerland and will feature a high-priced cup of coffee with some little something included as a bonus

'Fellatio Cafe' is slated to open in Switzerland and will feature a high-priced cup of coffee with some little something included as a bonus

The 'Fellatio Cafe', set to open in Geneva, Switzerland, by end of the year, will allow its customers to order a coffee before choosing a prostitute on their iPads. Men will have to pay more than £40 for the hot, robust drink and lascivious sex act,...

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Funny story: Readying For Olympics, Police In Brazil Arrest Prostitutes With Braces

Readying For Olympics, Police In Brazil Arrest Prostitutes With Braces

Men traveling to Brazil for the Olympics this summer breathed a sigh of relief today. A crackdown on hookers with braces in Rio de Janeiro rounded up 170 mostly female sex workers sporting the dangerous dental devices. Brazilian Director Of Touris...

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Funny story: Hillary's Latest Trash-Talk! Clinton Equates "Feel the Bern" with Gonorrhea

Hillary's Latest Trash-Talk! Clinton Equates "Feel the Bern" with Gonorrhea

Having had little success calling into question her chief political rival's personal integrity or agenda in light of her own checkered political past, Democratic presidential contender Hillary Clinton recently resorted to some good, old-fashioned tra...

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Funny story: Penicillin Ineffective For Computer Virus

Penicillin Ineffective For Computer Virus

Silicon Valley - Despite its well-known effectiveness against some viral diseases such as syphilis and bacterial infections caused by staphylococci and streptococci, Penicillin is completely ineffective against computer viral infections. This fa...

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Funny story: The Vice President Comes Out Against Disease Research

The Vice President Comes Out Against Disease Research

In a recent interview with MSNBC, Vice President Joe Biden made the startling proclamation that all disease research should be stopped, other than those related to curing sexually transmitted diseases. Biden claims that research targeting the cure...

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Funny story: Duck Dynasty Family Signs Up For Obamacare!

Duck Dynasty Family Signs Up For Obamacare!

The bearded and possibly inbred Robertson clan from "Duck Dynasty" signed up for Obamacare this morning with little to no trouble, says a family spokesperson. "It took like twenty minutes tops for the whole family!" said distant second cousin Red...

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Funny story: Derek Acorah speaks to the Duke of Wellington during spirit walk to his own toilet.

Derek Acorah speaks to the Duke of Wellington during spirit walk to his own toilet.

The television psychic claims he was randomly approached by 'The Duke' following an unintended 'Spirit Walk' during a restless night after a wine and cheese-fondue dinner party. After they had exchanged pleasantries, Wellington noticed the medium...

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Funny story: Kardashian's Doctor Warns of Asteroids around Kim's Uranus

Kardashian's Doctor Warns of Asteroids around Kim's Uranus

Reportedly looking for alternate ways to still play the victim and stay in the press over the Kris Humphries breakup, Kim Kardashian's personal trainer Sven Glutsen says that the family doctor has recommended that Kim come in for a sexually transmitt...

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