MAR-a-LAGO – (Satire News) – LaLaLand Daily is reporting that one of the former Mar-a-Lago maids is presently writing a book that will blow the lid off of the inner doings and goings on at the Trumptard’s “Casa Pussy Grabber,” as stand-up comedian Zydeco Dupree has pegged it.
LaLaLand Daily senior writer Macadamia Honeysuckle has identified the maid as Jolene Mallacuni, 29.
Mally, was in charge of cleaning the Trump’s master bedroom. And she says the things that she heard and saw could make a seasoned sailor or lumberistic lumberjack blush.
She noted that while she worked there, she heard and saw the orange mess (aka Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump) regularly call, text, and instagram Marjorie Taylor Greene, Maria Bartiromo, Kellyanne Conway, Stormy Daniels, Hope Hicks, and Sistella Buzzly, lead singer with the Hip Hoppin’ Ghetto Ho’s rap band.
SIDENOTE: Jolene Mallacuni has already been approached by a representative for Tri-Moon Films about starring as herself in the motion picture, “Donald Trump, He Ain’t No Jeffrey Epstein – But He’s Damn Close.”
