SAN ANTONIO – (Satire News) – Texas cattle rancher Ambrose “Slim” Pickweather, says that he is a fifth-generation cattlemen going back to 1837, when his great, great, great, great grandfather Otto “Slim” Pickweather owned over 2 million acres in Tumbleweed County.
Otto’s Mucho Bigo Ranch, covered three counties and had over 52,000 head of cattle. He was proud of the fact that he actually taught his cows to not stampede.
He would tell neighbors and friends that it was all about getting in the cow's mind, plus also showing them lots and lots of photos of New York Strip Steaks, T-Bone Steaks, Sirloin Steaks, and Fajita Steaks.
Ambrose, who has 14 children ranging in age from 3-weeks-old to 26-years old, prides himself in having the only cattle in the entire nation that will pose for photos on command.
When asked what his secret to that is, he smiles, wipes his brow, takes a sip of his Corona Extra Beer and replies, “Now THAT'S a secret, partner.”