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Funny satire stories about Cows

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Funny story: A powerful EF-5 tornado in Wisconsin picks up a herd of dairy cows and drops them down over 400 yards from the pasture

A powerful EF-5 tornado in Wisconsin picks up a herd of dairy cows and drops them down over 400 yards from the pasture

An extremely powerful EF-5 tornado hit the small farming community of Cheese Omelette, Wisconsin at 7:37 am Farmer Oland Briarmeister, who owns one of the biggest dairy farms in the county, said that he was out on his tractor when he saw the torn…

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Funny story: A Correction: Bill Gates Was NOT Fucking One of His Cows

A Correction: Bill Gates Was NOT Fucking One of His Cows

Gates owns land in California where he can put his feet up and enjoy his wealth … but, alas, without his wife. Since Melinda left town dragging her pre-nup behind her, Bill has been a little lonely. And he can’t call up his buddy Jeffery no more ‘…

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Funny story: Churchill's speeches increase milk production

Churchill's speeches increase milk production

SHROPSHIRE, England – (Satire News) – Pleasant speech increases milk production, a semi-scientific field research proves. In Shropshire, which is the real milk tank of England, a group of ranchers decided to raise their production to a new level.

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Funny story: Climate Fact - Belching Cows Biggest Source of Methane on Ever Hotter Earth

Climate Fact - Belching Cows Biggest Source of Methane on Ever Hotter Earth

A recent article mentioned belching Cows as Producing huge amounts of Methane. A quick Giggle Search mentions that there are 2 billion Cows on the planet - Belching night and day. They have two stomachs and grass is hard to digest. Then there is the…

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Funny story: President Biden Is Informed That India Is Rounding Up All of Their Sacred Cows and Shipping Them To Ukraine

President Biden Is Informed That India Is Rounding Up All of Their Sacred Cows and Shipping Them To Ukraine

NEW DELHI, India - (World Satire) - As everyone knows full well, cows in India are sacred. They are believed to hold mystical powers that can cure everything from dandruff to a yeast infection. The Global Source News Agency reports that anyone, ev…

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Funny story: Argentina Bans Cattle Branding

Argentina Bans Cattle Branding

BUENOS AIRES, Argentina - (World Satire) - PETA has just announced that Argentina has just voted to ban the age old habit of branding cattle with a branding iron that is hotter than hell. A spokesperson for PETA (People for The Ethical Treatment o…

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Funny story: An Ass Tax is Riding into Town

An Ass Tax is Riding into Town

There are more cows and sheep than people in New Zealand. And those animals (not the people) have been getting a free ride for too long. Get ready for the ass tax! Greenhouse gas emission, especially methane, from the assholes of cows and the b…

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Funny story: A Kansas Tornado Picks Up A Herd of Milk Cows And Drops Them Down In Oklahoma

A Kansas Tornado Picks Up A Herd of Milk Cows And Drops Them Down In Oklahoma

BURNT BARLEY, Kansas – (Satire News) – In a story that is so unbelievable that it could not possibly be true, the Vox Populi News Agency is reporting that an EF5 tornado hit the little town of Burnt Barley at 12:35 pm. And a dairy farmer, who look…

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Funny story: A Cattle Rancher In San Antonio Has Taught His Cattle To Pose For Photos

A Cattle Rancher In San Antonio Has Taught His Cattle To Pose For Photos

SAN ANTONIO – (Satire News) – Texas cattle rancher Ambrose “Slim” Pickweather, says that he is a fifth-generation cattlemen going back to 1837, when his great, great, great, great grandfather Otto “Slim” Pickweather owned over 2 million acres in Tumb…

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Funny story: Man Fired 'Gun' At Cow's Arse

Man Fired 'Gun' At Cow's Arse

A man who should probably know better at his age, has revealed how, during a motorbike ride to his place of employment this morning, he took aim with a child's plastic 'gun', and fired a tiny stone from it at a cow's behind, scoring a direct hit.

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Funny story: A Dairy Farmer in Minnesota Says His Herd of Cattle Love Posing For Photos

A Dairy Farmer in Minnesota Says His Herd of Cattle Love Posing For Photos

ST. CLOUD, Minnesota – (Funny News) - Dairy farmer Spencer Funkwood told a reporter with USA Today that he has been a dairy farmer for 51 years, and, in that time, he has owned over 27,000 milk cows. He said that he has never seen a herd of cows…

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Funny story: Cows Surge Past Man's House

Cows Surge Past Man's House

In an incident that locals have described variously as "shocking", "frightening", "uninteresting", and "not worth mentioning", a swarm of cows surged past a man's house this afternoon, causing perturbation. The excitement took place on the road ou…

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Funny story: Man Was Distracted, And Filled Kettle Over Its Limit

Man Was Distracted, And Filled Kettle Over Its Limit

A man has told of how, as he was filling a kettle with some cold water so that he could make a cup of tea this afternoon, he was distracted by the sound of cows mooing outside his back door, and inadvertently allowed the water in the kettle to rise a…

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Funny story: Nottinghamshire police issue apology after WPC arrests cow for breaking social distancing laws.

Nottinghamshire police issue apology after WPC arrests cow for breaking social distancing laws.

Molly the cow got the surprise of her life when, one minute, she was chewing some grass in a field near Babbington, and having a pleasant bovine conversation with Milly the cow about the taste of daffodils, and, the next, she was being tasered and ha...

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Funny story: A Farmer is Injured While Drinking Milk

A Farmer is Injured While Drinking Milk

SHEBOYGAN, Wisconsin – The local authorities are reporting that a local farmer sustained an injury while he was drinking milk. Sheboygan police officer, Wendell Braggberry, (Badge #3017) said that he took a statement from Silas P. Coogins, who own...

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Funny story: President Trump Visits India and Immediately Insults The Entire Country By Saying He Wants a Big Mac Burger

President Trump Visits India and Immediately Insults The Entire Country By Saying He Wants a Big Mac Burger

NEW DELHI, India – President Trump landed at the Ravi Shankar International Airport and was greeted by a crowd estimated to be about 95 or maybe 98, including two dozen or so airport workers. It was very windy as the president waved to the crowd m...

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Funny story: Veterinarian Becomes First to Offer Plastic Surgery for Cows, a.k.a. Moo Jobs

Veterinarian Becomes First to Offer Plastic Surgery for Cows, a.k.a. Moo Jobs

Tapping into what she predicts will be a growing market for animal plastic surgery, veterinarian Dr. Myra Goodrich is now offering cosmetic surgery on cows' udders, a.k.a "moo jobs". "Just like women who aren't pleased with the appearance of their...

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