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Funny satire stories about Cows

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Funny story: An Ass Tax is Riding into Town

An Ass Tax is Riding into Town

There are more cows and sheep than people in New Zealand. And those animals (not the people) have been getting a free ride for too long. Get ready for the ass tax! Greenhouse gas emission, especially methane, from the assholes of cows and the b…

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Funny story: A Kansas Tornado Picks Up A Herd of Milk Cows And Drops Them Down In Oklahoma

A Kansas Tornado Picks Up A Herd of Milk Cows And Drops Them Down In Oklahoma

BURNT BARLEY, Kansas – (Satire News) – In a story that is so unbelievable that it could not possibly be true, the Vox Populi News Agency is reporting that an EF5 tornado hit the little town of Burnt Barley at 12:35 pm. And a dairy farmer, who look…

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Funny story: A Cattle Rancher In San Antonio Has Taught His Cattle To Pose For Photos

A Cattle Rancher In San Antonio Has Taught His Cattle To Pose For Photos

SAN ANTONIO – (Satire News) – Texas cattle rancher Ambrose “Slim” Pickweather, says that he is a fifth-generation cattlemen going back to 1837, when his great, great, great, great grandfather Otto “Slim” Pickweather owned over 2 million acres in Tumb…

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Funny story: Man Fired 'Gun' At Cow's Arse

Man Fired 'Gun' At Cow's Arse

A man who should probably know better at his age, has revealed how, during a motorbike ride to his place of employment this morning, he took aim with a child's plastic 'gun', and fired a tiny stone from it at a cow's behind, scoring a direct hit.

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Funny story: A Dairy Farmer in Minnesota Says His Herd of Cattle Love Posing For Photos

A Dairy Farmer in Minnesota Says His Herd of Cattle Love Posing For Photos

ST. CLOUD, Minnesota – (Funny News) - Dairy farmer Spencer Funkwood told a reporter with USA Today that he has been a dairy farmer for 51 years, and, in that time, he has owned over 27,000 milk cows. He said that he has never seen a herd of cows…

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Funny story: Cows Surge Past Man's House

Cows Surge Past Man's House

In an incident that locals have described variously as "shocking", "frightening", "uninteresting", and "not worth mentioning", a swarm of cows surged past a man's house this afternoon, causing perturbation. The excitement took place on the road ou…

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Funny story: Man Was Distracted, And Filled Kettle Over Its Limit

Man Was Distracted, And Filled Kettle Over Its Limit

A man has told of how, as he was filling a kettle with some cold water so that he could make a cup of tea this afternoon, he was distracted by the sound of cows mooing outside his back door, and inadvertently allowed the water in the kettle to rise a…

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Funny story: Nottinghamshire police issue apology after WPC arrests cow for breaking social distancing laws.

Nottinghamshire police issue apology after WPC arrests cow for breaking social distancing laws.

Molly the cow got the surprise of her life when, one minute, she was chewing some grass in a field near Babbington, and having a pleasant bovine conversation with Milly the cow about the taste of daffodils, and, the next, she was being tasered and ha...

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Funny story: A Farmer is Injured While Drinking Milk

A Farmer is Injured While Drinking Milk

SHEBOYGAN, Wisconsin – The local authorities are reporting that a local farmer sustained an injury while he was drinking milk. Sheboygan police officer, Wendell Braggberry, (Badge #3017) said that he took a statement from Silas P. Coogins, who own...

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Funny story: President Trump Visits India and Immediately Insults The Entire Country By Saying He Wants a Big Mac Burger

President Trump Visits India and Immediately Insults The Entire Country By Saying He Wants a Big Mac Burger

NEW DELHI, India – President Trump landed at the Ravi Shankar International Airport and was greeted by a crowd estimated to be about 95 or maybe 98, including two dozen or so airport workers. It was very windy as the president waved to the crowd m...

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Funny story: Veterinarian Becomes First to Offer Plastic Surgery for Cows, a.k.a. Moo Jobs

Veterinarian Becomes First to Offer Plastic Surgery for Cows, a.k.a. Moo Jobs

Tapping into what she predicts will be a growing market for animal plastic surgery, veterinarian Dr. Myra Goodrich is now offering cosmetic surgery on cows' udders, a.k.a "moo jobs". "Just like women who aren't pleased with the appearance of their...

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Funny story: Chick-fil-A Admits "Eat Mor Chikin" Ad Written by Semi-Literate Employee, Not Cow

Chick-fil-A Admits "Eat Mor Chikin" Ad Written by Semi-Literate Employee, Not Cow

Restaurant chain Chick-fil-A recently admitted that its popular misspelled advertisement playing off the idea that cows want people to eat more chicken so that they, in turn, will not be eaten, was written not by a cow, as the ad implies, but by a se...

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Funny story: Republican Congresswoman Outraged at Separation of Non-Immigrant Baby Cows from Their Mothers

Republican Congresswoman Outraged at Separation of Non-Immigrant Baby Cows from Their Mothers

"It's an outrage," said neoconservative congresswoman Nancy Hartwright of Oklahoma City regarding the dairy industry's practice of separating native-born baby cows from their American mothers shortly after birth. "This is something that should happen...

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Funny story: Dairy Industry Explains that What It Does to Bulls Is Totally Different from Bestiality

Dairy Industry Explains that What It Does to Bulls Is Totally Different from Bestiality

"It's not even in the same realm as bestiality," said Larry Wells, CEO of Vermont-based organic dairy company Wholesome Secretions, Inc., regarding the dairy industry practice of stimulating bulls' penises to collect the semen used to artificially in...

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Funny story: Lorry Sheds Its Load Of Sheds

Lorry Sheds Its Load Of Sheds

There was a 30-yard tailback on a road in Battambang this morning, after a lorry shed its load of sheds. The lorry - which in the US would be described as 'the truck' - was being driven along the road from Baset in the direction of the city, by a...

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Funny story: Man Falls After Chasing Cow

Man Falls After Chasing Cow

There was controversy in Cambodia this afternoon, when a man who was chasing some cows out of his garden slipped and fell on a road, grazing the skin at the back of the top of his leg just underneath his bottom. The cows pass the Battambang home o...

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Funny story: Urine Luck - Cow Wee Cures Cancer?

Urine Luck - Cow Wee Cures Cancer?

New Delhi invented a new product made from cow urine that has a wide range of cures from cancer, diarrhea, to diabetes. It is on sale by the Bharatiya Janata Party and a BJPan official claimed, "My daughter tried all kinds of things" to get rid of he...

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