You Won’t Believe Why Oklahoma Has Outlawed Ribbed Condoms

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 14 June 2021

Hey!

The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for You Won’t Believe Why Oklahoma Has Outlawed Ribbed Condoms
Ribbed Condoms can be purchased at Walgreens, CVS, Jack-in-the-Box, or at your local Condom Shack.

OKLAHOMA CITY – (Satire News) – After receiving thousands of complaints in emails, text messages, Instagrams, and phone calls, the Oklahoma state legislature has voted to ban ribbed condoms by a vote of 57 to 43.

State Senator Barkston F. Goldensilver, of Horny Deer, Oklahoma, told assembled reporters that the reason is truly an unbelievable one.

Goldensilver, who recently revealed that the counterfeiting charges have been completely dropped, said that the reason why they have banned ribbed condoms is due to the fact that Oklahomans, who live in trailers or small apartments, with paper thin walls, are sick and tired of having to hear orgasmic women whose husbands or boyfriends wear those sensuously thick, erotic ribbed condoms screaming at the top of their lungs from sheer sexual enjoyment.

He went on to say that many of the Evangelicals say that the Banshee-like screams scare the hell out of young children, pets, and octogenarians.

Many of the Evangelicals told Goldensilver that they have been been married 30, 40, and 50 years and they have never once, even made so much as a peep, during their sanctioned and scheduled coital relations.

One couple, identified as Wilmer and Wilma Dorkenberry, who are both 79, said that they have always done the hokey-pokey on Saturday night, and in the dark, so Wilma said she has no idea if Wilmer is even circumcised or not.

In Other News. Kim Kardashian was recently asked by Don Lemon, if she misses her ex-husband Kanye West. Kimmy took a sip of her avocado margarita and replied, “Yeah…about as much as my humongous, industrial ass misses a bad case of diaper rash.”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more