The latest fashion for style and safety; it’s the body condom!

Funny story written by Earthvessel

Wednesday, 9 June 2021

image for The latest fashion for style and safety; it’s the body condom!
Hurtz and Mabley in their body condoms. Hurtz had not packed a lunch as is evident from the empty tip

The newest style craze sweeping across Europe has now hit the United States! You might say the full body condom is a style born out of necessity to suit our current social climate. While the style is certainly practical it surely gives fashion conscious hipsters an opportunity to make a bold statement while riding this late breaking trend.

One of New York’s premier fashion couple were spotted in SoHo yesterday in matching body condoms. Models Ricardo Hurtz and Minx Mabley say they are both elated over this trend. “I’m still a little shaken with the virus thing so I'd say this is a Godsend! It’s a style that keeps you hip and safe, so you can’t beat it!!”

Hurtz was a little more subdued in his assessment: “It’s cool. But I’ve had a couple of problems getting used to it. Itr can be tough getting it on when you have a big frame like mine...and when I first put it on I had it backwards and couldn’t breathe. Luckily for me, Minx was there and pulled it off before I passed out.”

Mabley quickly jumped in with a laugh “He started turning blue!”.

There have been no casualties due to body condoms have been reported to date.

Hurtz also had some practical tips for prospective wearers. "if you stretch the top a little, you can fit your lunch in there, then give it a twist and its sealed and fresh for whenever you're ready to eat! The only thing is, you need to remember to pack it before you get dressed and you need to get undressed to get to the food. That part is a little inconvenient, but all things considered, it's not so bad!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more