NEW YORK CITY – (Satire News) - Some of Lady Gaga’s closest friends recently confided to Celebrity Globe that they are afraid that Lady Gaga may hurt herself, since she has fallen into a depressed mood.
Bellatrix Coyotero, who is Gaga’s hairstylist, said that the singer has been saying weird things like she's going to get every single tattoo on her body lasered off, and is going to start all over.
Miss Coyotero also noted that the songstress has gone from eating three bananas a day, to eating 17 a day, which has caused her to make some very unusual jungle sounds in the middle of the night.
Pia Confetti with Celebrity Globe said that Gaga is really upset at the fact that her latest motion picture, “The Lascivious Circus Lion Tamer” has been put on hold due to an issue with two of the lions, one of the baby elephants, and the 91-year-old circus clown, “Orgasm-O".
Lady Gaga wants to assure her 82,298,276 followers that she is fine, and that it's just her darn left ovary acting up again.