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Funny satire stories about Depression

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Area Man Thinks Ex Still Cares

Funny story: Area Man Thinks Ex Still Cares

Years have come and gone since their inevitable break-up, yet local Burbank, CA resident, Steve Shaw, has continued to convince himself that the depressing fire that burns within his hopeless soul has somehow been reciprocated by his longtime ex-girl...

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Two-Thirds of Americans Are Despondent But Only One-Third Are Clinically Depressed/Suicidal

Funny story: Two-Thirds of Americans Are Despondent But Only One-Third Are Clinically Depressed/Suicidal

A report published today in JAMA Internal Medicine revealed that that the emotional state of the large majority (63 percent) of Americans is general despondency, but the good news is that only slightly more than one-third (34 percent) are clinically...

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How's Your Work/Life Balance?

Funny story: How's Your Work/Life Balance?

To most of us, 'Work/Life Balance' means being able to effectively allocate sufficient time and effort to both work and other areas of our lives, such as family, so that we can function well, and enjoy both. If only achieving it were as easy as defining it! I find achieving it impossible, because I hate work so much. I loathe it. I detest it. I abhor it. I would like to drag it kicking...

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Man Gets Stuck In A Rut

Funny story: Man Gets Stuck In A Rut

Reports have reached TheSpoof.com that a man has become stuck in a rut. The man, who must remain nameless because I don't want to give him the attention he craves, is said to have been in an extreme state of lethargy lately, and has done nothing w...

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Bipolar Baby Baffles Psychiatrists

Funny story: Bipolar Baby Baffles Psychiatrists

Alarmed by his dramatic mood swings, Nicholas Parker's parents took him to see a child psychiatrist, only to learn that their eleven-week-old baby suffers from bipolar disorder. “It came as a real blow,” admitted Nicky's mother, Shelly. “But at th...

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Pfizer Challenges Four Noble Truths of Buddhism Regarding Nature of Suffering

Funny story: Pfizer Challenges Four Noble Truths of Buddhism Regarding Nature of Suffering

In a press release issued late last night, pharmaceutical giant Pfizer officially challenged the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism regarding the existence and nature of suffering, claiming that its prescription medications have rendered these “truths” ob...

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Depressed Mould Experiences Back-To-Work Blues

Funny story: Depressed Mould Experiences Back-To-Work Blues

Gary Johnson, a blue and green mould has been depressed for a few days now, after being viciously washed off a mug. The germ form told us 'I had it on easy street, growing on a white mug, with plenty of sour milk in it, I was there for a couple of...

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Adele helps pregnant mothers by telling them; "It aint no fun being a mum!"

Funny story: Adele helps pregnant mothers by telling them; "It aint no fun being a mum!"

One of Britain's most famous exports, singer/songwriter Adele, has decided to go public and warned pregnant mother's about having babies, she say's "being a mum aint no fun!" Adele just happened to be paid a couple of million for telling her despe...

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APA Classifies Goth As "Narcissistic Depressive Disorder"

Funny story: APA Classifies Goth As "Narcissistic Depressive Disorder"

The American Psychiatric Association released a controversial statement this week that classifies goth style as a condition to be treated with anti-depressants. APA spokesman Cole Redpost suggested in a press release that families and loved ones of those suffering from Goth or Narcissistic Depressive Disorder now have medical treatment options to choose from for NDD sufferers. "The APA is re...

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Leg hair Links To Depression

Funny story: Leg hair Links To Depression

A study has discovered that the early onset of leg hair in teenage boys is linked with depression in later life. Dr L. John of the Institute for Back, Bum, Leg and Pubic Hair released a short statement. Dropping it from the institutes blimp as it soa...

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Mind-Blowing New Study Reveals Link Between Poverty and Depression

Funny story: Mind-Blowing New Study Reveals Link Between Poverty and Depression

A mind-blowing new study, The Gallup-Healthways Well-Being Index, recently revealed a link between poverty and depression, reporting that people living in poverty are actually twice as likely to be depressed as those who are able to provide for their...

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Old Man Born Again Every Day by "Old River East" (a.k.a. East River)

Funny story: Old Man Born Again Every Day by "Old River East" (a.k.a. East River)

While many consider miracles a thing of the past, New York man Kellogg Tracey experiences spiritual magic every single day, courtesy of the "Old River East" - more commonly known as the East River. "That Old River East is a boon to my spirit and...

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Presidential candidates to personally test Flint's water

Funny story: Presidential candidates to personally test Flint's water

Flint, Michigan - Determined to win back the good name of government, all of the remaining contenders for the presidency have agreed to personally test and evaluate the municipal water supply of this beleaguered city. "How bad can it be?" dema...

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Artist Sues Psychiatrist for Curing Wrong Complaint

A struggling artist has got Psychiatric Therapists fearing for their livelihood after filing a legal suit for malpractice. In what could be a landmark case, twenty-two year old abstract painter Thomas Dolehead, paints a pretty clear picture of how...

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Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Funny story: Blues Singer Fired By His Own Wife, Who Then Leaves Him For New Employee

Braxton, Mississippi - Henry Johnson Jr., a Mississippi Delta blues singer, was fired from his job at an auto tire shop by his own wife today, who then had sex with another man she hired to replace him. "The other man had no auto tire shop experie...

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Drinking Water may trigger Depression

Scientists are asking if water, though the purest liquid one can imbibe, may possibly cause brain chemical imbalance, leading to Depression. 'It may even be, that, getting drunk on alcohol is actually better, for maintaining optimism and not actu...

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Jesus Wants You For A Sunbeam - First 10,000 Applicants Only For Time Being

Funny story: Jesus Wants You For A Sunbeam - First 10,000 Applicants Only For Time Being

Jesus wants people for sunbeams again on an interim basis according to a message received by the Archdeacon of Scunthorpe, Dr. Godfrey Gordon Gustavus Gore. The Archdeacon has a private communication system which he accesses by putting his ear to...

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67% of all happy Facebook updates posted by people with miserable lives, study

Funny story: 67% of all happy Facebook updates posted by people with miserable lives, study

HARFOLD, Vt. - A study released this week by Harfold State College indicates that at least two out of every three happy Facebook status updates are posted by pathetic sons-of-bitches with miserable lives. Junior Bertrand Russell produced his Faceb...

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Breaking news…

Putin Hacked The Emmys

NBC, ABC, and CBS all claim that Russian President Putin hacked the Emmy Award computers, to explain how unknown, barely-viewed shows on Netflix and HBO could win so many awards.
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