The BBC has announced that, due to the deadly Coronavirus outbreak, and the new authoritarian rules imposed by the government to limit its spread, 'Strictly Come Dancing' has been put on hold, and will be replaced by a new show which stays well within ministers' guidelines, and which is sure to be a hit with braindead viewers.
'Strictly Come Distancing' is the concept of Tony Boggins, a creative designer at the Beeb, who, in a moment of inspiration, saw an opportunity to exploit the gap in Saturday night entertainment rent by the evil virus.
The same couples will still tackle the same difficult dances - the Tango, Waltz, Rhumba, Cha Cha Cha, Jive, Can Can, Bunny Hop, and so on - but will do so at the government-specified distance of two metres.
Everything else will stay the same, unfortunately.
It's bound to be great.
It was either this or repeats.