Elon Musk Tries to Turn Twitter Staff into Tesla Robots - A $40 Billion Dollar Gamble

Funny story written by UncleDale

Thursday, 17 November 2022

image for Elon Musk Tries to Turn Twitter Staff into Tesla Robots - A $40 Billion Dollar Gamble
Elon Musk, in happier times, graduating high school.

Right Wing Capitalist (and Head Twit) Elon Musk - according to the Ditzy News Network - has fired half the staff of Twitter - and can't understand why the company is losing money.

It was profitable before he took over.

All he did was get rid of half the staff - And got rid of most of the Staff Benefits - And made the rest of the Staff sign a loyalty Oath to him - (or get fired).

Just the regular stuff he does to his automotive workers.

He also wants unlimited overtime from the remaining workers.

"I have tried to be Compassionate to staff while getting rid of the Extravagance stuff" - he said. "Why are there two bathrooms one every floor and unlimited Bathroom breaks? these are young people - they don't have weak kidneys. My car factories don't have Bathroom Breaks."

Just because you make $80, 000 a year doesn't mean you have to eat lunch. And who needs Security? There are no disgruntled Twitter users these days. Not with Elon in charge.

"I am letting all the American Nuts come on to Twitter. Just charge them $8 - give them a little Check Mark to make them feel good. Good way to make a profit. Weirdos have a right to Twit. And Trump will soon be back. The wildest Twit of all.

"I will run the place by myself if I have to. Can't be that hard

"It's just another kind of factory. I only have $40 Billion to Lose."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more