Sergeant Musk Stinks Like His T-Shirt

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Monday, 3 October 2022

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Yep, Guns and Freak T-Shirts Will Win the War

Elon Musk is a fucking genius.

Ukraine should be neutral, that way the war will be over. (Was he wearing a “Occupy Mars”? t-shirt? Occupy? You a Russian spy in training, Elon? Got a little military boner in your pants? And he’s got a “Nuke Mars” shirt, too …. Yep, he wants to play soldier.) And did Elon say that those people in the annexed regions should be allowed to be Russian if that’s what they want? Then they can walk over the fucking border and be all the Russian they can be. They’re on Ukraine territory.

(Elon, have you heard of American Indigenous peoples? You might call them “Indians”. Do you think they liked Europeans taking over their country, and did the Euros say, “We’ll just live anywhere you’re not – we can share the country.” How are the Palestinians and Israelis doing sharing their scrap of land? Elon, there’s something called history …)

Gotta slow my fingers down to Elon’s level.

If Ukraine becomes neutral, Russian will march in and take over. Could the Nazis have walked into Switzerland and just take it if they wanted to? Yes. The only thing stopping them was that Switzerland is the world’s largest bank, and dead Nazis still have bank accounts there. So you don’t invade your bank – or your service charges might go up!

Ukraine is not a bank. Elon? Still with me, genius? I’m glad the Ukrainian statesman told you to fuck off. More rich egotistical asses like you need to be told to fuck off every day of their lives. Has your money backed up and is now stuffing your skull, vying for space with your brain?

How about this, Elon. How about Tesla and Spaxe-X and your other companies declare neutrality. You don’t want any hostile take-overs by other companies, do ya? Whaddaya think’ll happen, shithead?

You’ll be working for Bezos or Gates getting them coffee. (This must be a disease. Gates thinks he’s a doctor with his syringes for children’s arms, and Elon thinks he’s a war negotiator.)

People who have created think they can rule the world with more creations. Jehovah thought the same once, and how’d that go?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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