A Missouri Con Artist is Arrested For Selling Fake Tsunami Insurance

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 29 December 2020

image for A Missouri Con Artist is Arrested For Selling Fake Tsunami Insurance
This is the Walmart in Joplin, Missouri, where the fake tsunami insurance salesman was arrested.

JOPLIN, Missouri – (Satire News) – Police in Joplin, Missouri have taken Wally B. Haymarket into custody after receiving dozens of complaints from local residents.

It appears that Wally, who stands 6-foot-10-inches tall, but weighs only 142 pounds, was posing as an insurance agent at a local Walmart, and selling fake tsunami insurance to shoppers.

Haymarket, who was dressed as a Long Island pimp, gave the clients a fantastic deal which many of the shoppers said was just too damn good to pass up.

The fake insurance agent was selling $700,000 worth of tsunami insurance policies for just $2 a month.

He managed to sell at least 80 of the policies, which called for a down payment of $75.

A Walmart security guard went up to Haymarket and said that the chances of a tsunami hitting landlocked Missouri were about as likely as a Galapagos turtle winning a race against a Greyhound dog.

One little petite 91-year-old Swedish lady, who had purchased one of the policies, furiously went up to Haymarket, and kicked him right in his scrotum.

Wally refunded her $75, as he was being led away in handcuffs to the waiting squad car outside the store.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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