Man Thinks That All Things Are Relative
A man who thinks a lot has said that all the things we consider to be 'better' than other things are not really 'better', but merely 'different'. They appear to be better, but, to him, everything is the same. For example, claims Moys Kenwood, 57:…
Read full storyLipstick sales plummet as ageing rock star, Robert Smith of The Cure, admits he's just too old!
(NOT EDITED) Rocky Horror and Glam Rock were dead many years ago. Bands like The Sweet, Alice Cooper (Glam??), Marc Bolan and his T Rex, Kiss, Mud, Bowie and Ziggy, plus many more, have been buried into rock history, and lipstick sales plummeted.
Read full storyExperience: Jeremy Corbyn stole my Rhubarb
I'd had an allotment in Islington for a few years, and other allotment owners had warned me about security, saying that theft was a problem. I didn't believe it, at first. I mean, who wants to steal small amounts of home-grown fruit and vegetables…
Read full storyMouse Ran Over Sleeper's Arm
There's nothing as annoying as being rudely awakened in the middle of the night by some noise or other from outside in the street, but that wasn't the case for one man in the very early hours of this morning, when he was wrenched from his slumbers by…
Read full storyLeBron James Says The Los Angeles Lakers Will Be The First NBA Team to Get The C-19 Vaccine
LOS ANGELES – (Satire News) – LeBron James was thrilled beyond belief that his Los Angeles Lakers have been chosen by the Supreme Court to be the first U.S. sports team to receive the Coronavirus vaccine. James was told by Speaker-of-the-House Nan…
Read full storyMelania Trump Faints
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – Kayleigh McEnany, the official White House #brown noser, #kiss ass, #stooge, informed the news media that the First Lady did, in fact, faint. McEnany stated that Mrs. Trump was sitting at a desk, filing her nails…
Read full storyVenice is Planning on Seceding From Italy
VENICE, Italy - (Satire News) - Italy's national news agency, La Pizzaria, has conveyed that the city council of Venice will be voting on whether to secede from Italy or not. Venetians are reportedly as mad as a pizza maker who has run out of chee…
Read full storyJustices Offer to Hand Over Presidency to Trump if Ted Cruz Promises to Stay Away From Supreme Court Building
Washington - All nine members of the United States Supreme Court signed a legal brief agreeing to reverse the results of the Presidential election, providing that President Trump and the state of Texas withdraw their threat of subjecting the panel to…
Read full storyI'm Pulling Alexa's Plug
Covina, CA. Exclusive to Rolling Stone, Variety, Billboard and The Spoof. I'm fed up with Alexa. I didn't even want an Alexa, never heard of her until my son installed her in every room in my house. "It's a safety measure," he said, "since you…
Read full storyTrump Mistakenly Pardons Hunter Biden
The White House, Washington, D. C. - Overwhelmed by an enormous pile of pardons for members of his family, numerous aides, and some really bad guys, President Donald Trump inadvertently signed one for Biden Hunter, the son of President-elect Joe Bide…
Read full storyThe CIA May Shut Down Trump’s International Hotel
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A CIA investigation has revealed that the Trump International Hotel charged certain visiting dignitaries as much as twice the going rate for a luxury suite, and may be shut down. RumorLand News reported that Pre…
Read full storyNietzsche Didn't Know What He Was On About, Claims Man
The 19th-Century German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche, is at the centre of a mild controversy tonight, after a man who attempted to read his book, 'Beyond Good and Evil', claimed that he hadn't got the faintest idea what he was talking about. T…
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