And.... PULL! ; New Republican Alternatives to Abortion
In lieu of abortion, United States Republicans have approved a new usage for fetuses that die while still in the womb. Under new guidelines, once the woman is executed for her miscarriage, she will be ground up in a mulcher and spread on the White H...
Read full storyPep Guardiola Told That Manchester City Must Improve If He Is To Keep His Job
Pep Guardiola, Manchester City's Spanish coach, has been warned by the club's owners that his future is 'in the balance', and the team must show a significant improvement next year if he wants to keep his job. Guardiola has brought unprecedented b...
Read full storyOpen-Minded Boyfriend Supports Girlfriend in Her Vegan Hobby
In order to support his vegan girlfriend, Kayla Meadows, in her hobbies, Nick Canto attended a plant-based nutrition conference with Kayla, tolerantly setting aside that, while Kayla seeks to live a life of non-violence in every respect, including wh...
Read full storyRachel Riley Takes on Internet Trolls over AntiSUMitism
Countdown presenter Rachel Riley, has taken it upon herself to become the self-appointed spokesperson for the Mathematical community. "It's hard to imagine," explains Riley, "but there really are people out there who don't like maths. I call them...
Read full storyAlabama Legalizes Rape
In a landmark ruling that is sure to have a knock-on effect all across the country, and possibly the world, the state of Alabama legislature today passed a new law that makes it now completely legal to have sex with a woman, even if it is against her…
Read full storyGame Of Thrones: Furious Fans Want Ned Stark Brought Back
Fans of the HBO fantasy drama series, 'Game Of Thrones', are said to be "up in arms" over what is being called 'a major disappointment' at events in the eighth and final series of the show, with some calling for a radical rewrite of the scripts. '...
Read full storyBarr Admits that No One Saw the Unredacted Mueller Report Because He Spilled Coffee on It
New York, NY Attorney General Barr admitted, after severe press scrutiny, that he spilled coffee on the Mueller Report, and everyone all decided to just say the coffee-stained parts were segments that needed to be censored. "Well, we all know t...
Read full storyBTS Are "Completely Different" From Anything That Has Gone Before
They are currently the hottest thing in pop music, filling stadiums with screaming fans all over the world, breaking all records with sales of their albums, and topping the charts of all civilized countries who have them - they are BTS, the Korean K-...
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