Cricket Fan Went To The Toilet, And Missed Second Innings
A crazy Test match ended in crazy fashion yesterday, as Ireland, set a total of only 182 runs to beat England, crumbled in dramatic fashion, and were all out for only 38, much to the surprise of one TV viewer who had gone to the toilet for a crap.
Read full storyBoris Johnson: The Book Stops Here!
New Conservative Party leader and prime minister, Boris Johnson, has had to further delay the release of his biography of William Shakespeare, 'The Riddle Of Genius', for reasons as yet unknown, but it may be that its release will be cancelled altoge...
Read full storyEmergency COBRA Meeting at Downing Street as US Ambassador Says Johnson-Trump Relationship Will Be 'Sensational'
Panicked Downing Street sycophants and lickspittles were said to be running around in circles this morning, as America's ambassador to the UK said relations between the UK and the US are going to be "sensational" now that Boris Johnson is nominally i...
Read full storyTurmeric-Dusted CBD Oil-Infused Crystallized Ginger May Prevent Migraines
The majority of people who consume turmeric-dusted CBD oil-infused crystallized ginger, on a regular basis, do not suffer from migraine headaches, was the big takeaway from a study recently published in holistic health journal Aromatic Metabolics.
Read full story737 Ka-MAX-Kaze simulator upgrade
Boeing, Renton Field, Washington: After the revelations that 737 Ka-MAX-Kazee simulators can’t replicate the conditions which two 737 Ka-MAX-Kazee planes crashed, two airplane parking attendants, Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, have set up 'Dumb an...
Read full storyLondon Homophobic Night Bus Attack Boys Face Being Bummed On Live TV As Punishment
The four boys arrested and charged with the homophobic attack of two women who refused to kiss for them on a London bus in May, may have to face an extraordinary punishment if convicted - a sound, powerful and sustained bumming by muscular gay men,...
Read full storyAnti-Boris Johnson Mob Dispersed By Army
London: Army personnel have been drafted in to disperse protesters angry at the appointment of Boris Johnson to the head of the Conservative Party, and, as a consequence, to the position of British prime minister. The protesters, who had come with...
Read full storyTeacher Spent Entire Term Trying To Teach Students About Token Sea Creatures
A science teacher at a local school has revealed how he has just spent an entire fucking term in a pathetic and pointless attempt to teach students who had only very basic English language skills, about ridiculously-token sea creatures such as the oc...
Read full storyTreasury May Pay Off U.S. National Debt With Bitcoin
Treasury Department, Washington D.C. Hidden in a largely unread portion of the 600-page bill to fund the government and raise the debt ceiling, is a clause, tucked away in the middle of an overly-long paragraph, that might allow the U.S. government t...
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