Guy Shows Up At Interview Drunk
The candidate was slurring his speech, and said under oath, "I like to drink a whoooooooooooole lot!" He then whipped out and chugged a whole bottle of Jack Daniels, then overturned the desk and made a grab for one of the interviewers, who promptl...
Read full story“What do you like to drink, Senator?” question turns into country-wide enquiry by concerned citizens
Republican senators on the Senate Judiciary Committee have denied that Mr. Kavanaugh was sipping alcohol during the hearing Thursday. That is, with his periodic need to refresh his throat with what might have been water (Ms. Ford was sipping from...
Read full storyMan's Testicles Savaged In Shaving Accident
A man's testicles are special; they're delicate, and when, as sometimes happens, a man decides he wants rid of the lion's mane of pubus stragglia around his cock and balls, he either does it himself, or allocates the task to someone he trusts implici...
Read full storyMan aims to reach South Pole
Geoffcock Shackles, 43, of Norwich, is planning to be the first man to reach the South Pole solo, sustained only by biscuits. At McMurdo station, Shackles was ready to make the 2000km voyage to the South pole and back on foot, supplied only with h...
Read full storyMeghan Markle is praised for “shutting her own car door”
The Duchess of Sussex was praised on social media after a photo was seen of her closing her own car door on arrival at a posh party. Net junkies went wild with excitement, posting messages about this. Gotnolife wrote “Wow, just fallen off chair,...
Read full storyKennels for the homeless
Theresa May has revealed her new flagship programme to help thousands of homeless Britons find their way back into society. Today she announced that, from next January, homeless people will be able to apply for their own kennel, giving them shelter f...
Read full storyMan doesn't like Muslims
Geoff Baffle, 47, of Coventry, has begun a campaign to eliminate Muslims from his town. The campaign so far has 3,000 followers, but councillors have so far ignored him. Baffle protests that Muslims dress in a strange manner and often try to attra...
Read full storyDave and Gary - The Deathstar It Guys - A Star Wars story
Shane Millichip, a senior writer at Disney, has revealed the film we are all waiting for, 'Dave and Gary - The Deathstar IT Guys - A Star Wars Story', is set to be released in November 2021. Set on the Death Star in a galaxy far, far away, and a l...
Read full storyDunkin’ Donuts changes name after nationwide protests from kitted pink pussy hat wearers
The restaurant chain Dunkin’ Donuts announced on Tuesday that it’s dropping the word “Donuts” from its name, and renaming itself 'Dunkin’.' "The shortened branding will align with the company’s emphasis on coffee and other beverages," Dunkin’ Brands...
Read full storyFearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches
THE WIRED STREET URINAL REPORTER KR Schwartz DATELINE: September 27th 2018 Washington, D.C. Fearing Political Tsunami in November, Republicans Adopt New Approaches Feeling the mounting political pressure from constituents over the Senate Judi...
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