Melania Trump is Seeking Sanctuary
It was revealed through using the Freedom of Information Act and requesting the First Lady's communications over her international accounts that Mrs. Trump has been e-mailing all over the world seeking asylum from Donald Trump. She has sworn her...
Read full storyBill Cosby Wishes to Tour Prisons
Bill Cosby, convicted rapist out-on-bail on house arrest waiting to be sentenced, requested that he spend his sentence touring prisons and punishing felons. "I know it would punish me further if I had to listen to Bill Cosby jabber on about how he...
Read full storyIdiot regrets not knowing what a book is about before giving it to his girlfriend for her birthday
Idiot Wayne Johnson realised that he had done something wrong when his girlfriend Celia looked at him and asked 'Is this what you think I am?' Buying the book 'The Perfect Girlfriend' by Karen Hamilton in the book aisle at Tesco, when shopping for...
Read full storyTrump's Entire Cabinet Joins Anti-Mensa Group
Washington, DC The Trump Cabinet en masse decided to join "Auntie Mensah," a group that is considered the opposite of the group known as "Mensa," which is composed of people that have tested to be and known to possess high IQs or high intelligence.
Read full storySold Out Gig
Religious fans all over the world will be disappointed to hear that tickets for the Popes visit to Knock Shrine in Country Mayo have sold out! The Pope, who is on a greatest hits tour, will play the Shrine for two dates from the 25th of August this y...
Read full storyWorld Cup 2018: Swaziland Players Investigated for Albino Goal Celebrations
Swaziland players Shakira and Granit Xhaka face two-match bans for their pro-Albino goal celebrations in their side's World Cup victory over Serbia. Football's world governing body Fifa is investigating whether they broke rules on political and of...
Read full storyThe Secret England Footballer: Bloody Hell, Panama 6-1
Bloody hell I say and I'll say it again BLOODY HELL. A goal fest and where was I? I'll bloody well tell you, I was warming the effin bench again. It's every player's dream to play in a World Cup and as you know Brazil 2014 was a washout for me aft...
Read full storyUgliest 'Bitch on the planet contest' to be held at the Nutters Beach Club! Dia veintseis!
Well that was the weekend that was! England showing the world how to thrash a bunch of no-hopers and Germany getting their Bratwurst nearly burnt until a certain Herr Kross poked Sweden in the eye and, Herr Low nearly lost his wig! Never mind about all that BS at the fake World Cup, The Nutters Beach Club has been chosen by a bunch of corrupt doggy lovers to hold the beauty contest to end all b...
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