JFK Airport Security Guards Justify Workday Naps
Confronted with the evidence (photos of napping on the job), the security guards had a variety of responses about their behavior, when interviewed by reporter Gail Farrelly from TheSpoof.com. Here's a sample: -- "I catch a few winks during the slow hours, so that I'm ready to be extra vigilant during the busy ones." -- "Sleeping isn't allowed on the job? Really? I have to check this...
Read full storyCrop circle of dead MI6 cryptographer holdall sprouts suddenly at Alton Barnes Common
London - "These snooping claims are utterly baseless," the UK's top Spookmaster General said today as news of the field etching's materialization broke. "We don't need to outsource snooping on British Tea Party taxpayers to some sort of hush-hush,...
Read full storyGod Declares Himself an Atheist
HEAVEN-St. Peter released a statement today from God declaring that He is now an atheist. The statement read: "After spending years reviewing philosophical thought from the pre-Socratics to Plato to Aristotle, through the Stoics and the Skeptic...
Read full storySoap Sensation Shock Ordeal
The BBC have commissioned a new Soap in a sensational move to stop the drift away from the Beeb. It is to be called The Royal Family and is based on the success of the previously popular sitcom The Royle Family, about a bunch of layabouts. The...
Read full storyCoronation Street's Haley Cropper to get married again
With the recent legalisation of gay marriage, Coronation Street bosses have written the most unique fictional wedding in history as Roy Cropper and Haley Patterson tie the knot in a full church wedding. "Roy and Haley had a civil partnership back...
Read full storyHenry Kissinger Declared Winner Of Bilderberg Golf Competition!
The disqualification of Britain's Shadow Chancellor, Ed Balls for cheating during Sunday's final day Bilderberg annual golfing competition means original runner-up, 90 year old Henry Kissinger has now been declared the official winner. 'I suspecte...
Read full storyNSA Whistle-blower reveals that Obama isn't black
Spoilsport ex-spy Edward Snowden is in hiding in Hong Kong after revealing to the world one of America's closest-guarded secrets, namely that President Barack Obama isn't black. Snowden, using some Evil Genius software, commandeered every televisi...
Read full storyPrince Harry saves soldier from fashion blunder
Royal bad boy Prince Harry made a dramatic intervention last week, it was revealed, when a soldier from his unit almost bought a yellow t-shirt to wear with blue jeans. The incident occurred at a Next outlet in Afghanistan, when the private, drunk af...
Read full storyApple Spect-Apples Relaunched without ever being launched
Apple's answer to Google Glasses, Spect-Apples, have undergone a massive re-branding U-Turn before they are even out of the product design stage. "We spoke to our sample group," said head of product development, Anne Droyed. "They unanimously agre...
Read full storySimon Cowell Shell-Shocked After Being Pelted With Eggs During The Britain's Got Talent Finale
LONDON - Simon Cowell of Britain's Got Talent said that he had no idea when he made his remark that he hates chickens, chicken eggs, and chicken jokes that it was going to come back to haunt him. The fifty-three-year-old Cowell, AKA The Sultan of...
Read full storyNina Dobrev of The Vampire Diaries Reveals Her Fetish
BEVERLY HILLS - The star of The Vampire Diaries, Nina Dobrev attended a bachelorette party for a close friend at The Mrs. Ponce De Leon Hotel in Beverly Hills. Dobrev said that she went to high school with the guest of honor, Delilah "Third Base"...
Read full storyChicharito Says He'll Probably Give Up Soccer and Move To America If His Girlfriend Cheryl Cole Gets The X-Factor Job
LOS ANGELES - Cheryl Cole has made it perfectly clear that her number one priority right now is to do whatever it takes to get that coveted judge's slot on Simon Cowell's X-Factor. Cheryl has said that she has never been happier than she is now th...
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