Mossad joins Indian NCIS probe into Mumbai submarine blast
Mumbai - Banned on Vladimir Putin's orders from meddling - uh...contributing! - in an investigation into the sudden, unexplained destruction of Russia's flagship submarine the Kursk in August 2000 Mossad's forensic naval intelligence team has arrived...
Read full storyCory Booker wins Democrat primary, reveals he groped female, then announces run for NYC Mayor
NEWARK, NJ - Corry Booker, Mayor of Newark, announced today that he had groped a female friend, and that put's him in a position to run for New York City Mayor. Mr. Booker has also been dogged by accusations of corruption and malfeasance. His spok...
Read full storyNorth Carolina awaits first slave ship in 150 years!
Both houses of the North Carolina state legislature voted today to secede from the union and at the same time designated the state a Plantation. The bill which passed with large majorities in both houses appointed the current governor Plantation Over...
Read full storyWhat's In a Name? Plenty, According to Republicans.
Washington, D.C.- A group of Republican politicians led by Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, introduced a bill today that would create a national registry of pre-approved names that parents could pick from when naming their newborn children.
Read full storySecret NSA meeting on transparency blocked and bamboozled
An inside report from NSA HQ indicates a very serious meeting of top NSA officials took place today to "buttress" the President's recent public remarks on more transparency needed for massive dragnet surveillance. These NSA officials cannot be nam...
Read full storyRiots Hit Paris as France Bans English Pop Music
In recent years it seems that the august body l'Académie française which regulates the French language by approving new words and grammar is there just to prevent the French populace from communicating with the rest of the world, which speaks English...
Read full storyA List of 10 New NFL Rules For 2013
Over the years the National Football League has strived to do what it takes to make the game of professional football safer. And no one can argue that we have not come a long way since the days of leather helmets, one bar face masks, and a square football. NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has said that he and the NFL will continue to do whatever it takes to make sure that NFL players do not en...
Read full storySimon Cowell Could End Up Being Deported
NEW YORK CITY - Simon Cowell's horizontal hula with married socialite Lauren Silverman could come back to bite him in his British butt, as they say in Liverpool. According to several publications the X-Factor mogul who dilly-dallied with Lauren Si...
Read full storyRussell Brand Talks About Ex-Wife Katy Perry, Katie Holmes, and Kate Gosselin
HOLLYWOOD - Russell Brand recently remarked on The Viagra View that he does not miss his ex-wife Katy Perry one bit. He said that at first he did miss the way she used to talk dirty to him when they were in the privacy of their boudoir. Brand r...
Read full storyNorth Korean Leader Kim Jong Un Says Lindsay Lohan Is One Sexy Babe
PYONGYANG, North Korea - The leader of North Korea, Kim Jong Un has just told a reporter for the national news agency, The Rice Paddy Whack that he watched Lindsay Lohan guest host on Chelsea Lately and he said that Lohan is one sexy babe. Kim Jon...
Read full storyParis Hilton Spotted Leaving Charlie Sheen's Home at 4 A.M.
SHERMAN OAKS - It's no secret throughout LaLaLand that Charlie Sheen has been trying to get it on with Paris Hilton since the two appeared in an Attila The Hun Scotch commercial three years ago. According to Tittle Tattle Tonight it appears that t...
Read full storyBritney Spears May Be Headed To Rehab
VENICE BEACH, California - A close friend of Britney Spears has revealed that the Oops!...I Did It Again singer is still upset at having been fired from X-Factor by Simon Cowell. Spears was paid $15 million for her year on X-Factor and she fully e...
Read full storyLack of Words Rhyming With Orange, Silver, and Purple Could Spell End of Hip-Hop
LOS ANGELES- Hip Hop record producers and songwriters are feverishly searching for English words that rhyme with "orange", "purple", and "silver", fearing the end of the genre if no perfect rhymes are found soon. "When you can't even find a word to r...
Read full story