What's In a Name? Plenty, According to Republicans.

Funny story written by Geraldo O'Reilly

Wednesday, 14 August 2013


The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for What's In a Name? Plenty, According to Republicans.

Washington, D.C.- A group of Republican politicians led by Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell, introduced a bill today that would create a national registry of pre-approved names that parents could pick from when naming their newborn children.

"We got the idea from one of those Scandinavian countries, I'm not sure which one, but as soon as I heard about it I knew we needed something like that here in America!" McConnell said.

Citing what they perceive as a growing trend among celebrities to give their children strange names, the law makers claim that due to the influence of the entertainment industry, there is a risk that this trend might spread to the general public.

"Pilot Inspector, Kal-El, Bronx Mowgli, Moxie Crimefighter, Speck Wildhorse...these are just a few examples of the kind of naming tragedies we hope to prevent in the future." exclaimed Senator McConnell.

The impassioned congressman then said "And it will only get worse if we don't do something. You know these Hollywood types, always 'pushing the envelope' and whatnot. Sooner or later, some of them will get it into their heads to start naming their kids after body parts or even sex acts! The next thing you know your child is introducing you to their new classmates Testicle Smith, his sister Ovary and their cousin Fellatio. Heaven help us!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more