Martin Shuttlecock - Surfing The Net For Porn - Survey Results
Failing satirist, buffoon of long standing, idiot, crap diplomat, pariah, awful cook, bad husband, and beer guzzling, chain smoking idiot, Martin Shuttlecock, today embarked upon a lunatic quest intended to restore to at least some degree, his points standing on satirical website www.thespoof.com. By hitting the lowest common denominator...and surfing the net for porn. Here, he explains the...
Read full storyInteresting accounts stage a come-back
The public gallery at Peterborough Magistrates Court was packed again yesterday, after hundreds had queued to witness P.C. William Wordsworth testify for the prosecution. Ten motorists were up before the bench, charged with minor offences. P.C.
Read full storyKristen Stewart issues statement DENYING affair with director Rupert Sanders
Kristen Stewart has issued a strongly worded statement through her Attorney denying she had an affair with director Rupert Sanders. The 22 year old released a statment to online newspaper The Spoof "whilst I did touch this mans penis, I touched it wi...
Read full storyWiccans warn Barack about Friday's Blue Fool Moon
New York - The Carnegie Hill chapter of Filthy Rich Pagans Anonymous is right up Barry's ass over Friday's lunation according to a new hex-messaging service launched today. A rare and stunning second August Full Moon lights up the heavens in that...
Read full storyPrince Harry's antics trigger furious reaction from Prince Charles
The most famous ginger bastard on the planet Prince Harry has recently been caught with his pants down. The Prince released his royal pecker from its shackles whilst visiting Las Vegas which has resulted in extreme disquiet in Buckingham palace.
Read full storyNew Plans for Mentalympics
Doctor's have revealed the number of people being referred to a physcho[therapist] since the end of the Oh lympic [see #1] games has jumped to more than triple the figures before the game started. Pyscho Dr David Pole explains: "It quite often t...
Read full storyRed Sox on Bridge of San Luis Rey When It Collapses
The metaphoric tale of a bridge one year in the Andes Mountains may apply to the Boston Red Sox during this bridge year. In 1714 the San Luis Rey Bridge collapsed, killing five people. Thornton Wilder wrote his cautionary tale about the fate of so...
Read full storyDeadly pong closes Thames foot tunnel
London - A pair of vintage trainers missing since the Olympic Marathon are in the frame for last night's Greenwich foot tunnel closure. Dave Snargs and fellow running coach Alf Rancid are suspected of causing the stink that shut the Thames underpa...
Read full storyRed Sox Knock a Patriot Loss Off the Sports News
If turnabout is fair play, the Patriots owe the Red Sox one favor. Wouldn't it be nice if the Red Sox could pull off a blockbuster trade every time the Patriots stink? For the first time in recent memory, the Red Sox banished the defeat of the Pat...
Read full storyGOP to abort convention, "to save the life of the party!"
GOP Chairman Reince Priebus announced this morning that the Republican convention in Tampa would be aborted due to Hurricane Isaac. "We must think about the life of the party and of those that were planning to attend, said Priebus. "This conventi...
Read full storyPrince Philip Funeral Plans Found In Gents Toilet On Hampstead Heath
Draft plans for the funeral of Prince Philip have been found stuffed behind a toilet cistern in a gentlemen's toilet on Hampstead Heath. How the documents came to be there remains a mystery. The documents were found by a local kebab shop owner, Ge...
Read full storyPrince William in trouble following Harry's antics - What happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas
London, England. With the greater British community still coming to terms with the erratic behaviour of Prince Henry Wales, another disturbing report has emerged concerning his brother, the Duke of Buckingham, Prince William. It seems that the he...
Read full storyLady Gaga and Heidi Montag To Buy The Texas Nude Maid Service Company
LUBBOCK, Texas - The Texas Nude Maid Service Company was first established in April of this year. Its owner Lubbock native Essie Belle Tuckahoe had a vision that a cleaning service in which the maids were all nude could be successful. And Miss Tuc...
Read full storyRed Sox Version of Hunger Games
In a dystopian league's future, the totalitarian Red Sox Nation is divided between manager, front office and 25 factions among the team. Each year the highest paid player must demand to meet with the ownership to demand the firing of the current...
Read full storyHurricane Isaac first storm in decades not sent by God to punish sodomites, insists GOP
TAMPA, FL--As Hurricane Isaac bears down on the Sunshine State, home of the 2012 Republican National Convention, GOP activists and commentators are steadfastly maintaining that the tropical storm is not a punishment from a wrathful god for violating...
Read full storySidebar of Shame Throwaway Celebrity Gossip 25th August 2012
Prince Charles summons Harry for crisis talks: A heart-to-heart between father and son after naked photos in Vegas hotel Apparently James Hewitt was unavailable but sends his best. 'I did NOT have an affair with David Beckham': Katherine Jenkins blasts 'untrue and hurtful' rumours. She is however available to do any reality tv shows, even if she has to w*nk off a pig. So long Hev! EastEnde...
Read full storyRumours Of Katherine Jenkins Affair With David Beckham Rubbished By Reg Bond
As the internet was last night swamped with rumours regarding an alleged affair between Welsh Diva Katherine Jenkins and underpant pin-up boy, David Beckham, former minder to the stars, Reg Bond, from Burnley dismissed the rumours as 'rubbish.' Sp...
Read full storyMinneapolis Solves Its Unemployment Problem
MINNEAPOLIS - The city council of Minneapolis, Minnesota has just announced that it has reduced the town's unemployment percent all the way down to zero. Council member Delta Joan Muscaretello spoke with an assembled throng of reporters and she re...
Read full storyBurnley Apache Chief Cleared Of Animal Cruelty Charges
Well known Burnley Apache Native American Tribe Chief, Geoff Tattersall was completely exonerated of animal cruelty charges by Lord Chief Justice Ken Mither this morning at Burnley Crown Court. Tattersall, who appeared in court under his real name...
Read full storyRandy Travis - Country Music's Drinking Poster Boy
PLANO, Texas - Well it sure does appear that country crooner Randy Travis is still heading down that old country back road to self-destruction. The booze hound has been reported drinking up a storm and actually making the likes of George Jones and...
Read full storyFootball Gossip & comments 25th August 2012
AIK Stockholm fans took their "12th man" role to the extreme when they travelled to the hotel of their club's Europa League opponents, CSKA Moscow, and set off fireworks in the middle of the night. (Metro) The fans later apologised and blamed Stockholm Syndrome. Everton manager David Moyes has pulled off another coup by signing 17-year-old French wonderkid M'Baye Niang for £2m from Caen. (Th...
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