Millions of television viewers around the world were shocked and confused by a controversial report aired on the evening news by the British Bullshit Cabal (BBC). Ratings plummeted when home audiences watched the provocative segment with jaws dropped...
In his never-ending quest to erase any trace of the existence of "Barak Obama" from the annals of history, Donald Trump claims that the entire surface of the president's body is covered with a thin shroud of camouflaged elastic material to disguise h...
Despite proof revealed by Edward Snowdon, government officials disavow any knowledge of these classified systems. So why should they care if the confidential information is disclosed here for all to see? THE TIME MACHINE If you ever wondered why earth still exists instead of being vaporized to smithereens in a thermonuclear holocaust, it's because Armageddon really did happen but we went ba...
Officials at the US Department of Commerce endorsed the largest merger in corporate history by rubber-stamping the paperwork prior to returning it to the roll in the toilet stall at the lavatory down the hall. The amalgamation involved the acquis...
Politicians in London emerged from the basement at 10 Downing Street after spending 3 weeks sequestered in a marathon brainstorming session to contrive a scheme to quash the Scottish rebellion and subjugate them with draconian punitive measures. T...
In the latest round of NBA draft picks the Chicago Bulls signed Barak Obama to a five year multimillion dollar contract. With the exception of his high IQ, he met all the criteria for player eligibility - tall, black, and lanky. He was chosen abov...
Top officials at the United States Department of Homeland Security have declared a national state of emergency due to the hijacking of Air Force One, the presidential airliner. In a brazen act of terror the Boeing VC-25 was commandeered by the rad...
The web is a vast expanse of vice to entice you and virtue to hurt you; a worldwide wasteland with words of wisdom, terms and conditions and perverts living in a saturated cyberspace of sin and psychosis where content is king and everyone else is a surfer. It's a dark and dangerous jungle full of predatory pedophiles and the people they prey on. Hackers hack their way through the dense Amazon unde...
When you add up all the hours spent by all the people who have ever watched TV, the scope of the loss of life becomes clear. Viewers can't resist the spectacle of the glowing screen and fall victim to its hypnotic effect, and sit spellbound for hours. Whoever calls it entertainment only shows the sorrowful state of their mind. This device is responsible for the imprisonment and execution of mil...
In a narrow decision passed down by the US Supreme Court the contentious Racial Equality Act (REA)was declared the legal and binding law of the land. Writing for the majority, Justice Clarence Thomas reasoned that the only solution to end racism is t...
After decades of intense hostility, the United States and Cuba have finally agreed to let bygones be bygones and have a fresh start to an era of civility between the two arch-enemies. Diplomats from both countries signed a treaty stipulating the...
Greek Prime Minister Alexis Tsipras addressed the United Nations General Assembly to announce a formal declaration of war against all the other member nations of the European Union. He justified the aggressive military action by citing Greece's su...
In a clever political maneuver all 32 republican presidential prospects agreed to consolidate their collective power and run as one single multi-personality candidate. The new strategy is the brainchild of Carl Rove who said it was necessary to a...
Presidential hopeful Carly Fiorina has emerged as the new frontrunner in the race for the republican nomination. Figures from the latest polls show her ahead by at least 69 percentage points. The surge was attributed to a recent change in her campaig...
Japanese manufacturing firm Titsandass Inc. shipped their latest model of humanoid robots to malls in Tokyo and Hiroshima where depraved customers waited in long lines to purchase the sensational new product. Ostensibly billed as a household compa...
California Governor Jerry Brown ended the state of emergency conditions caused by the long drought that has ravaged the Golden State for years. Mr. Brown took credit for assembling a team of top tier scientists from Stanford and Berkeley who develope...
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