Commerce Department Approves Big Pharma Merger

Funny story written by Dick Sheerer

Thursday, 9 July 2015

Officials at the US Department of Commerce endorsed the largest merger in corporate history by rubber-stamping the paperwork prior to returning it to the roll in the toilet stall at the lavatory down the hall.

The amalgamation involved the acquisition of all the American pharmaceutical companies by a consortium of Mexican drug cartels.

Soon after Wall Street applauded the deal that was made possible by NAFTA, the stock market crashed because brokers sold all their shares to buy drugs to celebrate the new monopoly.

Investment firms are waiting with baited breath, eagerly anticipating, and even salivating, before a panel of judges finalize the contract subsequent to procuring a substantial bribe or two.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more