Hull Man Gets Own Back On Mosquito

Written by Moys Kenwood

Friday, 8 November 2019

image for Hull Man Gets Own Back On Mosquito
A man showing how to completely flatten insects

Reports are emerging from the Thai capital of Bangkok, that a mosquito that had already bitten a man on the leg, but continued to relentlessly stalk the victim for 'afters', has been killed, after the aforementioned man remorselessly swatted it to death.

The incident allegedly took place on the balcony of the apartment of 48-year-old Moys Kenwood, who shamelessly masquerades as an English 'teacher'.

Kenwood had been hanging some clothes out to dry at the time of the first attack, but was quick enough to spot the pesky airborne raider the second time, and was able to flap wildly at it with his right hand, the one with which he regularly performs 'bathroom magic'.

The mosquito was 'flapped' to the ground, whereupon Kenwood turned away, leaving for the ants to devour, which they did, minutes later.

A spokesmosquito for mosquitoes everywhere said:

"Unfortunately, this is the risk that we run by inserting our probosci into unsuspecting victims. Sometimes this backfires, and we just have to accept that."

Police are not investigating.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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