Semper Fi – [burp] – mutherfuckers, it’s the NRA to the rescue!
A new platoon of American NRA members have decided to put their guns where their mouths are, and head out to join Ukraine in its war against pro-Trump Russians.
Billy-Ray Sqwak has said: “I love guns, and guns love me. I got me 200 different types of guns at home, and they’s just gettin’ rusty. So me and the boys said, fuck it, why not head out and join a war already in progress, get in some shootin’ practice – and not on deer, but on human beings,. Ain’t that the big dream of the NRA in the first place?”
Problem is: will there be enough beer and beef to make the belly-heavy NRA members happy as they snore and fart and shoot and, maybe, occasionally hit something – even though that “something” fires back. (Unlike deer … pussies!)
Scoobie Hoss Crawdad has added: “I recokon them Ukrains have got beer – everybody got some somewhere, or moonshine from granpappy’s still, it’s all good – and if there’s a cow somewheres, then we gots ourselves a barbecue! Soooo-weeee! We’s goin’ huntin’ for long hog!”
Strangely, they were only able to convince two dozens of their fellow NRA neighbors to “man up” and put their bullets where their balls used to be, and head to an actual war. Many of them love to talk about “bugging out” when the zombie apocalypse comes – or the race war, some others said – but when an American talks, they rarely mean what they say, and need to make sure the enemy “don’t shoot back too much … why can’t they be more like deer?”
Pussies …
