Rockford, IL—As she walked through a fairground called Mayberry Town, she was in a hurry to make it to the portable toilet. She was on the run with the runs. She observed the ramshackle condition of the entire operation. She's a local teen named G…
Semper Fi – [burp] – mutherfuckers, it’s the NRA to the rescue! A new platoon of American NRA members have decided to put their guns where their mouths are, and head out to join Ukraine in its war against pro-Trump Russians. Billy-Ray Sqwak has…
Residents of Lonesome Heights in America were shocked to see a number of Banjo shaped parcels delivered to the house of a large family that have just moved into the area. Brick Flooring said 'They have just moved in, it is a big house, and they se…
Back in Pickleville Holler, I stopped by a roadhouse and I was greeted by a group of old men who were smoking pipes and drinking beer. A lovely farm lass walked up to me, handed me a leg of mutton and some cottage cheese. "We have to tell you an old wives tale that has been spread around about every year this time," the fishwife muttered. "It's been spread around with the moonshine, the hard a...
Wassilly, Alaska In an attempt to redeem her family's honor after their recent drunken brawl, former Alaska governor and Republican Vice-Presidential candidate Sarah Palin announced today that she will sponsor a new sports contest called the Hillbill...
WASHINGTON - Former Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin and her family, including husband Todd Palin, daughters Bristol and Willow Palin and son Track Palin were involved in a drunken fistfight at a house party in Anchorage several weeks ago. The one-time vice...
Question: What is a hillbilly exactly? Answer: Well, the name first appeared in a 1900 New York Journal article, with this description: "a Hill-Billie is a free and untrammeled white citizen of Alabama, who lives in the hills, has no means to speak of, dresses as he can, talks as he pleases, drinks whiskey when he gets it, and fires off his revolver as the fancy takes him." That pretty much...
Lindsay Lohan told what reporters who still hang around her that she thought Duck Dynasty was the worst show she had ever seen. Those at the scene stated that she laughed and called them Hillbillies. "What is this a joke? Television ratings so...
HOLLYWOOD - The mother of the Kardashian sisters, Kris Jenner has just attacked little Honey Boo Boo and her mother June "Mama" Shannon. Kris, who is married to Bruce "Stone Face" Jenner told The Tinsel Town Times Tribune that she cannot believe t...
READING, Pennsylvania - Kate Gosselin recently dumped her boyfriend Russell Brand and she's stated that her main focus right now, other than her children, is on getting another reality show. Gosselin told Bedroom Pillow Talk's Carolina Chipotle th...
Barack Obama has issued a presidential order to the Central Intelligence Agency to begin hiring all graduates of the Jethro Bodine Skool of Double-Naught Spying. Obama said that he feels these highly trained agents will be of immediate assistance to...
The State of Arkansas recently announced plans to spend millions on projects involving education, construction, and social work to help "clean up" the state for tourism. This is partially being done so that the state can follow the current administrations motto of "Change" (even though most folks in the state think that change is what you got in your pocket to use in the soda machine to get a c...
Blackwater Mountain, Tennessee - When it come to having explosive diarrhea, John J. Johnson, JJ to his friends, and daughter Jean J. Johnson are quite a team. John set a new distance record and Jean won first place at the Corn Hole & Washer Pitch...
Helen Griggsby, 6th grade science teacher at the Robert E. Lee Elementary School here in Stonewall, Tennessee, announced the science fair winners for this year. Ms. Griggsby has been teaching science for 37 years and taught just about everybody in t...
Canadians and Americans share a chunk of the northern American continent, they may look alike, and may at times also sound alike, but their similarities end there. GUNS 1,200 Canadians are killed by guns per year 33,000 Americans are killed by g…
Possum Creek, Alabama- The mystery of the whereabouts of several missing men was solved early Saturday morning. Repairmen from the Possum Creek Water Department found several buried bodies whilst trying to repair a busted watermain. The corpses we...
QUEENS, New York - The Fox Network has approached John McCain and Sarah Palin about staring in a semi-reality quasi-situation comedy show named "The Wasilla Hillbillies." Genghis W. Frisbee a high-ranking Fox Network executive stated that since e...
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