Who wants China balloon?
We make everything in world – and now we make balloon that can fly around the whole wide world!
We can even make it go off-course and pretend we lose balloon, we no have control over it – we have air force and secret spy satellites and jet fighters that can drop many bombs far from China – but we can’t figure out where balloon go?
Wha? WTF?
And it just weather balloon – greatest excuse ever – invented by Americans from Roswell, NM – don’t understand something? Weather balloon do it! Always weather, never spy. You have our cell phones in your hands? Good! They much better are surveillance than balloon. How about TikTok? Show me how you shake that ass, girlfriend, you so funny and sexy – and now China know where you live, who your friends are, what your hobbies … you think you win, but no! China always win!
So ignore that balloon in sky – that even American NORAD no see and shoot down – that only for movies from 1980s starring Matthew Broderick – American movie make America look good when in reality it so stupid it no see a YUGE fucking balloon floating across Alaska, down Canada (we own them; they look the other way, like good bitches) and into Montana – and THEN superior American air force shoot it down … but we deactivate it by then, all information already sent back to China, we just wanted to show you we can float over your skies as you fly over Taiwan, think you so big.
It just balloon, America … nothing to see here, lmao.
