PYONGPANG, North Korea – (World Satire) – North Korea’s Rice Paddy News Agency reports that the North Korean leader, Kim Jong-un hasn’t been as happy as he is now, since he first discovered his pecker (penis) at the age of 3.
Kim Jong-Un, who is almost recognizable after having lost 27 pounds on The Diet Rice Diet, says that if he wanted to he could easily boink a dozen or so different women daily.
When asked what is keeping him from it, he pointed to his wife and replied, “Dat bees her, she bees da reason.”
The Kimster noted that he decided to go into a low-profile mode after he started launching all of those wayward rockets, some of which came pretty damn close to hitting Japan.
Kim did want to stress that the rockets were not armed with weaponry and were all merely just for show.
He then added that the rockets that are armed with nuclear weapons are hidden underground, about 17 miles south of the town of Fried Rice, North Korea, on Inter Korean Highway 69.
