MSNBC's Chris Matthews admitted to asylum in Weinsberg, Germany

Written by joseph k winter

Tuesday, 25 February 2020

image for MSNBC's Chris Matthews admitted to asylum in Weinsberg, Germany
The asylum specializes in cold baths and "get a grip" training sessions

Klinikum am Weissenhof psychiatric hospital at Weinsberg, Germany, has generously stepped forward to offer treatment for MSNBC's Chris Matthews.

The Klinikum is a state-of-the-art psychiatric hospital, specializing in delusions that cause fear and impair patients' ability “in managing reality.”

Mr. Matthews was flown directly to this facility following his comparison of the Sanders Surge with the sweep of Nazi Germany through Europe in 1940.

He was also distressed recently with the possibility journalists might be executed in Central Park, and suggested Mr. Sanders might be ordering him up for the firing squad, if winning the 2020 presidential nomination.

MSNBC's Psychiatric Department went directly into action Sunday.

Klinikum am Weissenhof responded kindly “to a fellow freedom-loving country, in its own crisis, now that we're over ours.”

Sanders is currently a “democratic socialist” with the key message that re-balancing wealth in America is badly needed.

A consequence of his emphasis, which indicates that if elected, the American Plutocracy will have to pay more taxes, has brought on a deluge of smoke-bombs, demonizing, and gleaming eyeballs.

Mr. Matthews has nothing against Sanders personally, but fears the enveloping voter surge at this time in the primaries is “encouraging another Hitler,” according to insider sources.

Mr. Sanders has replied he will not for a moment consider growing a white Charlie Chaplin mustache directly under his nose.

When called “flippant” for this remark, he further responded:

“Mr. Matthews should flip his brain around to understanding the difference between a lying megalomaniac bent on world conquest and my campaign!”

MSNBC has publicly announced hopefulness in Mr. Matthews' recovery, citing numerous events that have put their News Anchor on edge recently.

Additional to Mr. Sanders' surging popularity in the primary contests so far, Members of Big Wealth have been shaken to the roots of their tax programs.

Mr. Matthews:

“If Sanders is not a Nazi, he's a commie for sure, right? Or maybe controlled by outer space aliens?"

Klinikum am Weissenhof's response:

“We specialize in manias here! Especially those Hitler-induced!”

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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