Prince Andrew Impassive Over Jeffrey Epstein Death

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 11 August 2019

image for Prince Andrew Impassive Over Jeffrey Epstein Death
All's well that ends well

The death in his cell of suspected sex trafficker, Jeffrey Epstein, has had no visible effect whatsoever, on the affairs of Prince Andrew, it has been reported.

Financier Epstein was being held in prison for offences he was alleged to have committed against underaged girls, but was discovered 'not breathing' early yesterday.

The BBC reported that:

"Epstein's body was taken to a hospital in Manhattan where he was pronounced dead."

What, Epstein's body or Epstein? The body was taken there or Epstein was taken there? The body was pronounced dead, or Epstein was? If it was 'just a body' and not 'Epstein as a living entity', why was the pronouncing not done at the prison, rather than waiting until it/he arrived at the hospital?

Is something amiss here?

Doesn't someone only become a body after their death? If so, doesn't the fact that 'his body' was taken to a hospital in Manhattan' rather than 'Epstein was taken to a hospital in Manhattan' mean that it/he was already dead before he left the prison'? And, if that's the case, why can't the BBC say that?

Am I looking too deeply into this?

Or is there something distinctly Pont de l'Alma about this whole topic?

In any event, Palace sources say Prince Andrew is fit and well, and enjoying life, and expects to do so, in positive luxury incomprehensible to plebians, for the forseeable future.

And why wouldn't he?

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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