Tests carried out by Anthropologists trying to cheer up the population of rain sodden Wales have revealed that whatever happens to Venezuelans, they come up smiling and have an unshakable belief that things will get better.
The controversial tests carried out at Goole university were performed using student volunteers. Groups of representatives from every country in the world were tested against control groups from the nearby university of Scunthorpe. Volunteers were told that their houses had burned down, that they had contracted Aids, they were infected with Ebola virus and all their friends and relatives had cancer.
The Venezuelan volunteers reacted by singing cheerful songs, saying that God would make things right, they would win the lottery tomorrow and grinning. They were soon saying that every cloud had a silver lining and that things were bound to pick up tomorrow. In stark contrast, when the control groups were treated similarly they were all found to have hanged themselves on the morning after the tests. Now the government has to decide whether to quietly introduce Venezuelan genes into the Welsh population or to lure the Welsh people away with nubile sheep and restock Wales with Venezuelans directly.