Sacre Bleu!
Pinch the planet! Trump indicted? Why and for which investigation? Was it for a parking ticket in Jersey, or trying to start a revolution to stay in the White House, paying hush money to a porn star, or tax returns, or that rape case in the dressing room at Bergdorf Goodman, or burying his first wife next to the first hole on one of his golf courses?
Rumor has it that he punched his second-grade teacher in the face. It has been downhill from there. He was eventually sent to military school to straighten him out. Being indicted at age 76 doesn't say much for the military school, but he did graduate from Wharton's School of Business. Has he ever addressed the graduating class at Wharton?
No, no, no, Donald Trump was indicted for paying hush money to a porn star, Stormy Daniels, before the 2016 election. And the same New York grand jury is digging into another woman who was also paid hush money before the 2016 election.
Speaker of the House Kevin McCarthy vows to hold New York District Attorney Bragg "and his unprecedented abuse of power to account." McCarthy also insisted that Trump's indictment "would do irreparable damage to the country." And blah, blah, blah.
This is the first time a former U.S. president has faced criminal charges.
But the good news in another courtroom is that Gwyneth Paltrow won her ski case and 1 dollar for damages. Oh yes, plus attorney fees.
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