Whaddaya Know, Evil Joe?

Funny story written by Ana Sian

Friday, 2 September 2022

image for Whaddaya Know, Evil Joe?
Don't Scare Away the Voters, Joe, Just the Haters.

I gotta admit, that pic looks scary. (Granted: Halloween is coming.) Joe Biden is really giving ammunition to his haters by standing in front of black and red, with a couple Marines in the back – though they look like wee tin soldiers, so they’re not that scary. (Trump holding up a Bible … that’s scary.)

What was Joe thinking? Did he want to give the MAGA crowd a taste of their own? They are devils, but they think they’re Christian angels. They love all things Nazi, but now Joe is stealing their thunder in a single thousand-word picture.

Ah, so that’s what he’s doing!

He trying to scare the shit out of the evangelical voting base – they’ll think he’s Satan and not vote for him (a no-brainer there), but … nah, the logic breaks down there.

Whaddaya doin’, evil Joe? They’re calling you Dark Brandon … so, they’re feeding right into your hand. But what’s the plan, Stan? (I must stop listening to old Paul Simon songs.)

Joe’s feeding a Satanic image to the people who still believe Satan is real. Why, Joe, why? Why not pull a Ronald Reagan and make yourself messianic, talking about a shining white city on a hill (from St. Augustine?), and maybe even try dressing as Jesus. MAGA morons will believe anything if you repeat it enough. Maybe burn some toast with Jesus’ face on it? Nah, even a dumbass MAGA will see that dirty trick – they invented them.

I dunno, Joe. I like Satan and everything, but you gotta think about the vote. Maybe try having stigmata? Christians love that shit so much they want Jesus to come back and kill everyone, except themselves. You could be the Second Coming, Joe! Holy shit on a Saviour – that’s it! Play the devil first, then “redeem” yourself in the eyes of all voters by appearing as Jesus!

Somebody call Wardrobe and Make-Up, we got another speech to write for Joe, with a better back-drop.

(I think the MAGA idiots are just jealous cuz Joe thought up these optics, when they're more appropriate for Trump. That's why they've said about this dark Joe what the Dems have always been saying about Trump. Satanic, evil, etc ... yep, everything they say about their enemy fits their dictator to a T.)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more