BILLINGSGATE POST: Intended consequences are one thing. Unintended consequences are quite another. Who would have thought that a penis pump could cause cognitive disorders? When Joe Biden unwrapped his ACME XXX Penis Pump, did he not read the warnings and contraindications included in the instructions?
Apparently not.
Not since President Trump commandeered all of the discarded penis pumps left behind in the Obama White House, utilizing them to help drain the swamp in Washington, has there been such an example of unintended consequences.
Anyone who has read the onerous warning labels on seemingly harmless items, knows what I am talking about. You would have to be crazy to attach anything to your body without reading the instructions.
But who can blame a 79 year-old man for wanting a little help from a friend? And now, while his little pump is humming away, he stoically accepts whatever might happen to him. While his staff attempts to hide his foibles from the public, everyone knows that somehow, his brain is being drained. Only his wry smile allows that he is semi-aware of what is happening below his belt.
Of no particular relevance to the story, but included, nonetheless:
Little Willie in the best of sashes
Fell in the fire and was burned to ashes.
By and by, the room grew chilly
But no one wanted to poke up Willy.
Dr. Slim: “Could he reverse the damage if he used a brain pump, instead?”
Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. When a man is drained of his vital juices, only bad can happen.”
