Lauren Boebert doesn’t care that, yes, she had abortions and was a hooker. Now that abortion is illegal, she’s lookin’ to get laid by anyone who loves guns, Jesus, the Republican party.
“I wanna go to swinger’s clubs, nudist beaches, dark alleys, porno theatres with glory holes – I’ll fuck anyone, anywhere, anytime. As long as you ain’t no Democrat! Hillbillies only!”
When asked what she would do if she became pregnant by a stranger in a dark alley or a disgusting men’s toilet, she replied, “I’ll just give it to an orphanage or leave it on the doorste3p of some church. Fuck the thing – once it’s born, I don’t give a flying fuck about it. Let the Catholics deal with unwanted children. They’ve been doing that for 2000 years – why d’you think so many priests LOVE kids? I’m just giving them what they want. Praise Jesus!”
So if you are a right-wing whackjob and wanna get laid by an American politician who acts like she’s still in high school, call Loren’s office today. She’s eagerly waiting for you, hot stud. Call now and mention this article to get ten percent off a three-hole fuck. Ooooh baby, Boebert wants it to hurt so good!”
