Star of the American documentary series Star Trek, Captain Kirk has claimed that his recent trip into space wasn't as good as his first one, which started in both the past and the future, confusing anyone who likes the linear aspect of time.
'The first time was really exciting' said Kirk 'I was surprisingly really attractive to everyone, and no aliens ever killed me, although a lot of them did try, but this time, we just went up, and came down again. It really wasn't worth me putting my socks on, to be honest'.
When asked if he would like to go again he replied 'Sometimes, when you have gone past the final frontier, all you want are your slippers and a nice cup of tea'
