Dolly Parton Says If Trump Were To Grab Her Pussy, It Would Tear His Hand Off

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 11 October 2020

image for Dolly Parton Says If Trump Were To Grab Her Pussy, It Would Tear His Hand Off
Someone making a grab for a pussy

Dolly Parton, the mega-successful Country and Western chanteuse, has broken her own self-imposed rule about keeping quiet on the subject of politics by firing a 'warning shot across the bows' of the US president, Donald J. Trump.

Commenting on the President's self-confessed penchant for grabbing female genitalia, she asserted that, if Trump ever risked pulling the same stunt with her, he'd better be prepared for a surprise.

The Tennessee-born singer warned:

"If Donald J. Trump laid a finga on ma pussy he'd wanna be wearin' some forma armor platin' - that's if he wantsta see that finga again."

Making any bolder attempt - grabbing, for instance - would almost certainly end in disaster, she said.

Unless amputation's on his mahnd," she drawled.

President Trump is reputed to have very small hands, which makes it all the more unbelievable that he has been able to grab anybody's pussy, let alone the pussies of several women.

In a financial sense, the President could be said to have very effective hands - they being all over anything with a high value - and to have a finger in every pie.

Still, Ms. Parton was unmoved and adamant:

"It may look lahk a harmless littl' thing, but if Donald eva steps outta line, he'll wind up armless."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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