Ruth's Revenge Plagues Trump

Funny story written by Mike Peril

Sunday, 4 October 2020

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Superspreader event sickens President

Washington, DC - As Donald Trump celebrated his new Supreme Court nominee in defiance of the dying wishes of Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, he had no idea the fate that awaited him.

But supporters of Justice Ginsburg knew exactly what could happen.

Within a week, President Trump figured it out. The crowded, unmasked social event turned into a COVID-19 "superspreader", having infected the President and his wife, three GOP U.S. senators, advisors Hope Hicks and Kellyanne Conway, Trump's "bodyman", the head of the RNC, Trump's campaign chair, the President of Notre Dame, and debate advisor, Chris Christie.

Now Trump and Christie are in the hospital with coronavirus, their health and futures unclear.

"Never underestimate the strength of a ninety-pound woman," said one former law clerk of Ginsburg. "She made her dying wishes clear--the next elected President should select her successor. Trump dared to defy her. Now he knows better."

Some have been calling it Ruth's Revenge. Maybe it's just bad luck. But either way, Trump is reportedly trying to retract his decision.

"RBG, if you're out there, what can I do to make this up to you?" Trump tweeted, still feverish.

Chris Christie fears the worst. "Pleez little Donny, take back that nomination! RBG will kill us both!"

Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell is not budging. "We're moving forward with the nomination. I don't care about Ruth's Revenge. If Trump and Christie are sick, so be it. With my new conservative majority on the Supreme Court, who needs them?"

Meanwhile, Democratic opponent Joe Biden wishes Trump well. "Obama had ObamaCare, Trump has the virus. Let's hope he recovers from the Trump Virus having learned his lesson. Can we all say 'pre-existing condition'? Wear a mask America!"

What will happen to President Trump next? Only RBG knows.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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