The US President petitioned the court to reject the outcome of the election if he loses, on the ground that any result which does not see him re-elected “must be fraudulent”.
Trump’s lawyer, Rudy Guilliani, argued that the November 2020 election will be the most important in America’s history because it could either see a legitimate Trump administration or a totally illegitimate Democrat take the White House.
Expert witnesses gave evidence by Skype, including “Honest Vlad”, also known as President Putin of Russia, and “Concerned Citizen Kim”, the leader of North Korea, who both emphasized that Donald Trump is a man they can work with and would like to see in the White House.
Guilliani asked the court if it really wanted a return to “big state” politics, with taxpayers’ money helping people in need and restrictions on the right to shoot coloured trespassers. Supporters whooped and cheered, while Democrat Nancy Pelosi angrily shook her head.
After hearing the motion, Judge J. Morgan the Third said “Bollocks, motion dismissed”, banged his gavel hard on his table, got up and walked out.
Trump’s lawyers said they are carefully reading the judgment for grounds of appeal.