Corn Shuck, Iowa – A group of very devoted evangelicals, who had been blindly following President Donald Trump, met at a Knights of Ponce De Leon Meeting Hall.
The spokesperson of the group, who said his name was Marco Polo, stated that they have been growing more and more disgruntled with the dozens, then hundreds, and now thousands, of incessant lies that come out of Trump’s orange mouth.
They stressed that there is no way in their heart of hearts, or stomach of stomachs that they can clearly vote for such a heartless, self-centered, leathery-faced punk who only cares about himself, KFC Chicken Tenders, Ivanka (aka the White House Barbie), Scott Baio, Hope Hicks, and Big Macs.
Another group member, Jenny Greenstone, 42, said that she compares Trump to a pit bull, but adds that there is a difference, in that, a pit bull has balls, whereas Trump has ovaries.
Greenstone noted that the "Racist-in-Chief" is so damned mean, that when the Devil greets him at the fiery gates of Hell, he'll tell him: "Fella, we’ve got lots of mean sons-of-bitches, and bitches down here, like Hitler, Mussolini, Hirohito, Jeffrey Dahmer, Charles Manson, Ted Bundy, and Laura Ingraham, but compared to you, those mother effers are all pantywaists.”
Mrs. Greenstone had mentioned that Laura Ingraham was already in Hell, but that is not the case. Actually, the horse-looking beatch is still spewing forth her hellishly hate-filled hatred at Fox News.
