Fauci and Newsom get down to it in dark little club on collapsing virus narrative

Written by joseph k winter

Sunday, 21 June 2020

image for Fauci and Newsom get down to it in dark little club on collapsing virus narrative
Coveela Forever is one of the stars at Club Methuselah

Inside sources have provided video coverage of an important political meeting to discuss the current state of the pandemic.

Problems:

*shrinking virus narrative;
*credibility gap increasing;
*perception management campaign weakening;
*etc.

Last night in the bowels of downtown San Francisco, the Governor and Dr. Fauci met at a small drinking-hole named Club Methuselah (location classified),

They sat at the bar in each other's ear and not social distancing.

Club Methuselah offers three shining poles and dancers, which may or may not have influenced where the two dignitaries located themselves for their conversation.

Evidently aware of these guests, dancers swooped toward them at times, and lowered into frontal squat behavior.

Layla Spheres, Rolita Shylee, and Coveela Forever, specialists in string costuming, declined to interview for this report.

Their performance was assisted by continuous hand-sanitizing of the poles, in descent and ascent, plus plastic shield-masks.

Mr. Fauci and Mr. Newsom did not wear masks.

(White House; Masks and distancing not required for these officials. Security clearance.)

Other customers wore masks on entering. When seated, masks were off.

Free air space above, to the sides, below, and surrounding the seated customers was not a problem.

Waiters and waitresses wore masks at all times.

To the audio:

I tell you, Governor, the problem is this: American people do not believe in science or authority. We must take the gloves off.

Take them off, Tony? Look, get off my back. I just put out a bunch of orders. As with even driving alone in your car, you should wear a mask.

Should, Gavin? Wow! Did you see that? What's her name again?

I think that one is Layla. Oh! What's that, honey? Say again? She got pretty close to us that time, Tony.

I keep talking to Donald about this. Masks must be absolutely required, at all times. In the vehicle, at home, in bed, on the toilet, you name it!—I believe this is the way we must go, Gavin.

Well, I do have an election coming up you know. And I hear there's a recall petition out there--

Your duty, Governor! The American people have to be led! Whoa! Was that Layla again?

That was Coveela, I think. But--

Yes?

We're not wearing masks. I'd hate for this to get exposed, but--

We don't need them, Gavin. Authorities don't need them. We're exempt. Only ordinary people need them. You think Donald wears a mask? Give me a break.

Ah . . .

Whoa! Now the other one what's her name? Rolita Shylee? I love it!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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