Trump To Sue CNN For 30% Poll Result

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Friday, 12 June 2020

image for Trump To Sue CNN For 30% Poll Result
They say the bunker leads to the lagoon...

Donald Trump, also known as The Bunker Guy, or The Creature From The Black Lagoon, is miffed by the most recent poll taken by CNN. Surprise, surprise, it indicates Trump has fallen into the 30% range, as in 38%.

Caramba! That’s good news for America!

So incensed, Donald Trump’s campaign is demanding CNN retract and apologize for their recent poll that indicated Trump was way, way behind Joe Biden, the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee.

Team Trump says the poll wasn’t well managed, and fake.

Translation: It wasn’t controlled by Trump or any of his immediate family members. But if the numbers were switched, and Trump received 62% and Biden 38%, then everything would be fine and dandy. Just give Trump the winning numbers.

CNN must withdraw and apologize, or the Trump team will go ahead with their own poll.

And the public can assume what the Trump team will do with that poll.

Caramba! That’s bad news for America!

Trump thinks tear gas used on protesters is beautiful. Trump used mounted police on horseback, tear gas, and rubber bullets to clear a group of peaceful protesters so that he could stand in front of a church and hold up a bible. "It was like slicing through butter," said Trump.

Which lame brain Trump operative thought of that scene? Missing were the black shirts, but mounted police were appropriately dressed in black shirts and boots.

If Trump is at 30%, that means the 70% majority will make this country American again.

Caramba! That’s good news for the world and America!

Read more by this author:

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more