Hail the Venerable Trump!

Written by T. Loaf

Wednesday, 27 May 2020

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It all seems so small...

So now it's official. The people of America are celebrating and dancing in the streets.They've toiled and sweat blood to give him space and time to spread his word. They need him. They love him. Americans have finally succumbed to the soft-spoken scalliwag defying global collectives and modern science, who's rejected those outdated codes of honesty and decency, who will return for four more years to the White House, in due course. This is what Americans want: America First! Lock 'em up! Build that wall! The Mob rules! Americans have reached the Promised Land.

Having severed ties with the WHO, disparaged the UNO, denounced US media, and quit all agreements on climate change cooperation, Mr. Trump has now gone one step further: he wants to pull out of the Human Race altogether. "It's just not our scene," stated the President. And his advocates and disciples waved their placards and cheered and shrieked 'Hallelujah!', and jeered the few who scratched their heads and muttered "tut, tut...".

After announcing separation from the world community, the Donald declared 'The United States of America 2.0' open. A wall is to be erected around the entire nation (funded by the Mexicans and Chinese), contact to 'other' nations forbidden, no-one in, no-one out, America First, guys! And people were filled with elation and pride and drank in the sounds of their leader. Now they had their 4th of July, their baseball, pick-ups, Coaching Little Leagues, hunting and fishing and Country and Western, they simply had enough. What more could there be? "Nothing!" said Trump.

Sure, one or two would always frown. But hey, what the hell, as long as they made no trouble. The Mob had snuffed out the meek and fair, the Mob was on its way and rode off into the sunset, victorious.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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