BILLINGSGATE POST: Ultimately, truth matters. Although it is understandable that an old man can’t remember digitally penetrating an aide twenty-seven years ago - especially when one’s memory erase is set for two days - you best have your game plan together when you lie to your wife.
Joe was out with some of his buddies for a round of golf. On the way home, after a few cocktails in the Men’s Grill, he decided to stop off and have a fling with an old squeeze. They made wild passionate love for four hours; a hosin’ and a blosin’ till her mama come a nosin’.
Driving home, Joe’s first thought was that he would tell his wife that he and the boys decided to play 36 holes. But his conscience got the best of him. He decided that he would tell her the truth; that he had made wild passionate love with his old squeeze for four hours.
And so he did.
But his wife didn’t believe him a bit.
“You lying bastard! I know what you did. You played 36 holes. Don’t ever lie to me again.”
Slim: “Doesn’t pay to tell the truth anymore.”
Dirty: “Yo, Dude. You gotta stay focused when you’re lying.”