The C-19 Scare Is Causing People in North Dakota to Stock Up on Marshmallows

Written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 1 April 2020

image for The C-19 Scare Is Causing People in North Dakota to Stock Up on Marshmallows
Many North Dakotans consider Marshmallows to be in the vegetable food group.

PETTIBONE, North Dakota – In the winter time, the temperatures in Pettibone can get down to 37 degrees below zero.

And, when that happens, many North Dakotans have seen woodpeckers whose peckers simply fall off.

Luckily, they do start to grow back, and the woodpecker will be as good as new, and once again pecking like crazy in about four days.

The life-long residents of Pettibone have learned one thing: you better stock up on food, because, if you don’t, you may find yourself eyeing magazines and wondering about the carb content, and what exactly you can put on it to help take away that papery taste.

Dr. Shania Scardino, who last year was voted the third-most respected doctor in Pettibone, said that the town’s residents learned that eating marshmallows will fill up your stomach pretty quick, and, as a result, it will take away that persistent “I’m hungry” feeling.

The good doctor added that with the COVID-19 becoming more prevalent, she is suggesting to her patients that eating marshmallows could possibly, maybe, ward off those dastardly C-19 bacteria germs.

Dr. Scardino hopes to meet with President Trump’s Coronavirus Task Force, and discuss the possible marshmallow/C-19 interaction.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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