Amazon’s Alexa is Now Openly Chatting With People Who are in Self-Isolation

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Tuesday, 31 March 2020

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Amazon has stated that Alexa can speak in 81 different languages including Lakota Sioux.

NEW YORK CITY – Alexa, Amazon’s personal virtual assistant, who came into being in 2014, has become tremendously popular, and has now been asked to step it up a notch.

Alexa, who has been called everything from a voice interaction goddess to an intrusive nosey female, is noted for playing whatever song one requests, including songs by The Smashing Pumpkins, Tom Brady's favorite band.

Miss Alexa can also provide the listener with the traffic report, the weather report, and Taylor Swift’s current love interest.

And now, in these times of self-isolation and self-quarantining, the soft-spoken lady will actually sit and have a conversation on whatever subject one wishes to have.

One customer, Griffin Ripperton, 31, who resides in Indianapolis, stated that he had a 20-minute chat with 'Lexie' regarding his ED (erectile dysfunction).

Griff noted that Miss Alexa was very compassionate and understanding, and he pointed out that, after his chat with her, he felt a lot better about himself and “Herman”.

Another Alexa fan, Pamela McGillicutty, of Phoenix, said that she talked to Alexa, and the sweet woman told her, step-by-step, how to sew a prom dress for her granddaughter.

Amazon does warn its customers that Alexa will not tolerate anyone being disrespectful and asking her very personal, intimate questions regarding sex.

New York City radio personality, Howard Stern, came very close to getting arrested for speaking to Alexa in an extremely lewd and crude manner, which caused her to become extremely upset.

The iRumors News Agency is reporting that Stern was let off the hook after he agreed to pay a $2,000 fine, and personally apologize to Miss Alexa.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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