CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee - Hundreds of thousands of Taylor Swift’s fans who reside in Tennessee, are pleading with her to run against Senator Marsha Blackburn, who many say has lost the last few marbles she had.
According to Political Salad Bar Magazine Blackburn has the distinction of being the meanest, most heartless, most evil woman to ever hold a political office on both sides of the Mason-Dixon line.
Nancy Pelosi once said about Sen. Blackburn, “I tell you what, that woman is so mean, she makes the Orange Tweeter look like a girl scout.”
PSBM’s Savannah Bamboo stated that she heard that "Blacky" as Kamala Harris calls her, once tried to choke a baby duckling because it had taken a bite out of her cornbread at a "GOP Only" picnic.
Luckily for the little duckling, a park ranger saw her, and hit Blackburn over the head with a loaf of Wonder Bread, until she released the little duckling who waddled off unhurt, scared as hell, but unhurt.
Taylor says that she will spend as much of her own money as she needs to, in order to make sure that Senator Blackburn returns back to Tennessee and her ho-hum life of collecting relics from extremist organizations.
IN CLOSING – Trump fan and long-forgotten TV actor, Scott Baio, offered to help Senator Blackburn by campaigning for her. The senator reportedly replied, “Oh, no, please, please ,Scotty, you’re a 'jinx bitch', so you just stay the hell away from me.”